1:12pm
Reno, NV
Sometimes, people accuse me of being smart.
And I’m not.
I’ve hung around legit smart people, and I’m definitely a back-bencher: Intelligent enough not to murder myself operating kitchen appliances, but never gonna help send a rocket to Mars.
Still, I consider myself a savvy kinda dude.
Been around the block a few times. Saw some shit, had close calls with having my ticket punched, caused trouble in some exotic and interesting joints around the globe.
I grew up next to the tracks. (Literally. Southern Pacific freight trains rumbled by twice daily behind our back fence.) (I can sleep through anything now.) Been broke and desperate, and flush with more moolah than I knew what to do with. Spent many years with the loves of my life, and had my heart ripped out and stomped in the dirt.
Did some impressive things. Did a lot more really, really fucking stupid shit, and suffered exquisitely awful consequences.
Hey have you checked out my latest report, A Grizzled Pro’s Guide to Marketing Psychology, yet? What are you waiting for? It’s time to dive in deep, beyond booksmart, to see how people (yourself included) really tick.
Floundered around most of my youth. Stumbled into multiple mentorships that woke me up, turned me around, and sent me off on adventures that few men have enjoyed.
Learned my lessons well. Applied them to everything I did. Honed my chops, got out of my funk, pursued goals I had no permission to attain. Attained them anyway, and prospered.
Most of all, I’ve had the privilege of helping others over the last 30 years or so, through speeches, masterminds, books and personal mentoring.
Things had turned out so well for me, that I’ve been able to pay the universe back by sharing everything (literally everything; I don’t hold back at all). Going on twenty years for this blog — where the articles are always free.(Check out the archives — it’s really a complete free tutorial in life and biz.)
I’ve been a busy little bastard, too. Created a pile of books and courses and stuff, listed along the right side here. Hosted the most exclusive mastermind in the biz for a decade. Have 3 books on the desk here waiting to be finished. All on how to beat the odds against you, and create your own sizzling wealth and happiness.
Now doing a weekly podcast with Kevin Rogers and Daniel Throssell (3 generations of successful copywriters, answering The Big Questions in modern marketing). Free. (Go to Psych Insights For Modern Marketers at pi4mm.com and catch the latest episodes. It’ll change your life, Bucko.)
And yet…
… I still wonder how much more I could have accomplished if I’d been, you know…
… smarter.
You know what the answer is?
Nothing.
Being even a wee bit smarter… or even more properly educated…
… wouldn’t have helped at all.
Cuz growing up working class, struggling to find my place in the world, blundering through the business world without a clue, sneaking into places I was never invited, and pestering mentors…
… that’s where I cobbled together the kind of “smarts” that results in moving through the world with purpose, confidence, and a vicious “eyes on the prize” attitude that never accepts failure.
I’ve been lucky, yes.
But more importantly, I was always focused on learning my lessons and applying them.
It’s a simple way to go through life. And one that the vast majority choose to ignore.
I saw a study once that insisted the best IQ for entrepreneurs was around 120. Give or take a few points.
You can’t get into MENSA until you’re above 130. Smug, elite bastards, MENSA.
At around 120, you’re bright enough to quickly grasp concepts. You can beef up your critical thinking skills to amazing levels, so it’s not difficult doing research, creating products and marketing campaigns, and navigating your way through the sociopaths and criminals and idiots (mostly the idiots) who haunt every single market niche on the planet.
At 120, you can learn, apply what you learn, and profit from making disciplined plans and implementing them.
But you know what else that study said?
Higher IQs actually impeded people trying to become successful.
I don’t know how much I actually believe that, but I do know that few of my friends and colleagues with embarrassing large IQs (I have many) have accomplished much of anything beyond academic goals. Most are essentially broke.
I can see where being told you have a high IQ, coupled with watching the majority of your fellow humans bumble about like somnambulant zombies…
… should have automatically led to a life of luxury, success and fame. Maybe even on a silver platter. .
But it doesn’t.
Because just being smart ain’t enough.
The universe laughs at your insistence that it should be.
I’ve thought about this a lot.
And here’s the thing: Being conspicuously “smart” just means you have the capacity for doing things with your brain that lesser mortals aren’t blessed with.
There is zero guarantee that bloated prefrontal cortex floating in your noggin will get you anywhere in life by just sitting on it.
Even folks who do accomplish shit, based on sheer brain wattage, don’t automatically lead better lives.
Did you know that medical doctors are among the most gullible professionals around, when it comes to financial scams?
The geniuses who operate on brains, can’t wrap their own around the idea that being awesome in one endeavor doesn’t mean you’ll ace every situation you encounter in life.
I’ve met so many experts in one field, who are utter doofuses in anything else they attempt. They’re just lost in our complex society, baffled by the rise of idiocy and failure to comprehend basic science amongst the general population.
Good lesson there, too. Might help you understand yourself and the folks around you better.
Anyway, I’ve been thinking about what endows someone with actual “smarts”.
And here’s my breakdown:
1. Raw IQ is pretty much worthless without being honed.
Like a naturally gifted athlete who never applies themself to a sport. That gift dissipates quickly. (I also met a large number of very accomplished musicians — mostly guitarists — who would have been stars… if they’d only bothered to get into a band, make it work, and step onto a stage. But no. They either felt too superior to sully themselves with other musicians unworthy of their company… or they simply lacked the drive to overcome their shyness or “playing well with others” deficiencies. This frustrated me no end. Especially while trying to put together bands in high school — we’d get a gig, my buddy Bob and I, and then slap together a band to play. Budding entrepreneurs, we were. And the best musicians we knew just flat out refused. Too scared, too smug, too bad they missed out on the fun.) (And it really was some of the most fun I’ve ever had.)
2. The “honing” part comes along with experience.
You go out into the world, encounter shit, blunder through obstacles, fail a bunch (but dust yourself off and get back at it), and meet all the different kinds of thieves, scoundrels, psycho’s, and normal people that populate the joint around you.
And you figure out what the lessons are in each of the situations you get yourself into. You learn the lesson. You apply it the next time, get good at your new tactics, and continue to grow in all ways. From experience. Getting dirty. Getting slammed down by life and recovering as fast as you can so you can try again.
The lessons you learn in real life are what shines up your raw intelligence (whatever your IQ is or isn’t).
And suddenly, the world starts to make sense.
3. Along the way, you develop skills you never had before.
You perfect the skills you need to thrive in your chosen career, and you attain the skills required to be an expert in any new field you pivot into.
The truly smart person looks over any situation you encounter… figures out how your current bag of skills will fare, and what new skills you need to master to be successful… and then seeks out the resources and mentors available to do exactly that.
It can be uncomfortable, the first time you force-feed new information and skills into your overburdened skull… but soon enough, it becomes a habit… cuz that’s how shit gets done at a high level in this universe.
4. You gotta murder your ego.
It’s Step One in any adventure you intend to undertake. You develop a life philosophy that meets the demands of reality — and most of the time, you’re gonna come up short in new adventures, cuz you don’t have the experience or right skill set. Which is absolutely fine, once you’ve realized that your new skill of figuring out what you don’t know and need to know becomes a big part of your existence.
Most people just allow others to implant a core set of beliefs, and never challenge any of it. Their worldview has been set in stone since high school, surrounded by a thick wall of stubborn refusal to change.
And that’s fine for civilians.
But it’s NOT fine for entrepreneurs.
You gotta be more nimble. You should have a bigger and more nuanced worldview, with the skills to adapt to anything thrown at you.
Problem arrives:
- You figure it out.
- You seek out resources you need.
- You throw yourself into the solution.
And that’s pretty much what defines a good life.
And you know what? Your goddamned ego won’t help with ANY of this.
What’s your ego done for you, ever? Except get you into trouble?
Egos are for losers.
The true professional operates solely in reality… where critical thinking and resourcefulness trumps every other skill.
5. Finally, having “smarts” means you live like a good animal.
Take care of your health — mental, emotional, physical, spiritual, and financial.
To get a fast education in doing that, maybe check out my book “The Entrepreneur’s Guide To Getting Your Shit Together”. You can get a copy, cheap, on the right side of this page. It’s not just about copywriting. In fact, that’s the least of the lessons taught. You’ll be equipped to lead a much better life, and much more lucrative career, after reading.
None of this is rocket science, by the way.
If it all seems daunting to you, I’ll share a little secret: It ain’t.
You just need to apply yourself. A little bit, even.
All the top entrepreneurs and writers I know have developed the discipline to learn, and change, and adapt to whatever challenges come their way.
The hardest thing to learn was simply allowing discipline to be their guiding tactic. You need to learn something, you go learn it. And really learn it, not just do your usual glance at the stuff and call it a day.
Entrepreneurs will thrive or die in the real world, depending on how they handle the unrelenting assaults of a hostile universe on their dreams and goals.
I was a slacker when I started out. Decided to take care of business before having any pleasure — cuz I really, really enjoyed hanging out at the bar with my pals. But that had to go to the end of the list, because I decided I wanted to be successful…
… and I was simply gonna do what was necessary to make it happen.
Along the way, I developed a wicked set of “smarts”. Despite my very obvious shortcomings in the raw intelligence thing.
If I did it, you can, too.
Hope this helped.
Stay frosty,
John
P.S. Is it possible to get the equivalent of a university degree in marketing? You might argue that might latest podcast is even better, cuz it’s all real and tested with zero theory. And it’s free to listen to. Check out Psych Insights for Modern Marketers: 3G Edition right now.
Thursday, 4:03pm
Reno, NV
Hunkered down…
Howdy…
One of the best Zen lessons I ever had busted over my head was the role of anxiety in our lives.
Something does or doesn’t happen that tweaks your mojo, your stomach knots up, you sweat like a pig, you get get brain-vapor-lock and can’t stop obsessing over past and future events.
You are held captive by anxiety.
Blood pressure burbles up, heart races, hands shake, eyes tear up.
Then… suddenly… a fresh crisis occurs.
You receive an emergency phone call, zombies attack, some doofus rear-ends you in traffic, the dog gets in a fight with a rabid squirrel, an earthquake knocks over you and the furniture, or whatever.
Your mind is instantly freed from the anxiety, as you marshall inner resources to deal with the immediate incoming shit. (Killing zombies is hard work.)
This proves your anxiety is an invention of your own bad-ass mind.
A concocted fear of things outside your control.
You’ve done it to yourself.
Later, calmer, you can deal with the original anxiety-provoking situation. Apologize, clean up the mess, make amends, pay your penalty, accept the consequences…
… and move on.
You know what can help you overcome anxiety and live a happier and wealthier life? The ability to communicate with your fellow humans. Something you can learn to do for FREE right over here.
Anxiety is an invented state, to a great extent. You can also beat it with hard-core exercise (or a few pints)…
… but the main realization is that you can beat it.
Strangle it at it’s worst, crush it like a bug even as it crests in your system.
Murder the little bastard.
It might take some practice. Without the intervention of good tactics (like good old Americanized Beat-inspired Zen), you can spend your entire life shackled to the whims of your super-ego. That nagging voice telling you you’re not good enough. That vague sense of impending doom and failure, no matter how experienced you’ve become at something. Feeling like an imposter about to be revealed, like a criminal about to be exposed, like a pathetic twerp deserving ridicule.
It’s all bullshit. There are warring sub-personalities inside your head, and too often the wrong ones win.
You have SO much more input than you realize, if only you’ll take back the control room in your brain.
Write your own script for a change, and let your love-light shine.
Anxiety sucks.
So do the usual prescriptions for dealing with it (via our overlord, Big Pharma).
Zen out, instead.
Once you’re feeling calm and relaxed, it’s a good time to focus on your goals. You’ll find lots of resources to make you more successful right over here.
It’s only hard while you’re in the initial battle with the demons refusing to relinquish control of your life… and once you get good at vanquishing them, you can stop worrying about zombies.
Stay frosty,
John
P.S. Be sure to check out the courses and books available here on the blog.
This is a GREAT time to get the basics of solid salesmanship (and especially salesmanship-in-print) down cold… as the world pivots to some new version of “normal” that will eat the weak and demand intense discipline from the survivors.
Stay tuned.
Sunday, 4:31pm
Reno, NV
“You think you’re alone until you realize you’re in it…” (Elvis Costello, Watching The Detectives)
Howdy.
Short post today…
… and yet, it may be the most important thing you read all year.
First, a bit of context:
We all have shame, hiding deep inside us.
No matter how successful, pretty, rich or beloved you are…
… a dark pool of roiling shame lies below the surface. It’s just part of our animal nature — that big slab of neo-cortex which gave us language, critical thinking and vast memory storage also gave us the capacity to register shame.
And hold onto it forever.
Shrinks make a fortune seeing clients who are obsessed with their shameful past. And it’s a renewable resource — because the way many psychologists treat it, the shame never really leaves.
And I say: Fuck that.
Let your shame go, and be free of it.
It really can be that simple.
Listen: Holding onto your secrets is a choice. Not an obligation, not a command, not something you have no control over.
You actually have HUGE amounts of control over what you choose to hold onto. Also what you think about, what keeps you up at night, what bothers you, and — especially — what holds you back.
It’s just that no one TOLD you about this power before. And there’s no Owner’s Manual around to find instructions in.
It’s a glitch in the human system: You’re born, you grow up, you do stuff or have stuff done to you that triggers shame… and it becomes a 200-pound backback you haul around with you for the rest of your journey.
Or, anyway, that’s how most folks approach it.
What can you do? It’s just part of the game.
Except… it isn’t.
Now that I’ve simply told you about this secret power you have — the ability to choose what you hold onto — you’re essentially free.
You may choose to ignore this new power, and continue to cling to your shameful memories. That’s a choice you can make.
Or, you can fire up that new power, and just let it all go.
News flash: You are, nearly always, the ONLY person on the planet who cares about your ancient shameful memories.
If there are others who have some kind of investment in keeping you riddled with shame… well, you also have the choice to eliminate them from your life.
It’s not rocket science.
Let it go.
Isolate the memory, define it, box it up in your head. Name it. Make that box strong, unbreakable, and lock it forever.
Then… toss it from your brain.
Let it go. And get the fuck OVER it already.
If you need to make amends, do so. If you need to find new coping tactics for the next time you’re triggered, find them and incorporate them into your new power to let go.
But choose to be free of shame.
If you like, you can replace shame with something more proactive: Remorse.
When you do something that used to create shame, engage your ability to feel remorse instead. Remorse is temporary: You fucked up. Fix it, if you can. Clean up your mess, apologize, and take steps to do better next time.
Then actually TAKE those steps. You may need to learn some new skills. Learn them. You may need to have awkward conversations with people. Have them.
You may need to complete a whole “to do” list in order to do better next time.
Do it.
That’s how adults handle fucking up.
Rookies and children and emotional zombies go straight to shame. You didn’t just fuck up — you’re a bad person. There’s something horribly wrong with you. Your shame is eternal and unfixable.
Which is all bullshit.
Shame is like setting up camp on your life’s journey. You seldom move on. You’re stuck in place, wallowing.
Remorse is a pit stop. Oops, screwed up. Get out the mop and coping strategies, make thing right… and move along.
You’ll be a more effective and worthwhile person for feeling remorse, and taking steps to do better next time.
It’s a bit like “failure” to an entrepreneur.
To civilians, failure is personal, the end of the world, a nightmare that will never leave.
To an entrepreneur, failure is just another step along the path to success. Everyone fails sometimes. So what? Lick your wounds, figure out what went wrong, take steps to do better next time…
… and get back in the ring, armed and ready for the next go-round.
Okay, then.
You now know your shame is bullshit, and fixable.
You no longer have the excuse to wallow in your misery, because you have the power to escape that self-destructive crap.
Whether you use it or not is up to you.
And I say: Start your new year right.
Get busy, and stop hauling around that 200-pound backpack.
Stay frosty,
John
Wednesday, 3:03am
St. Pete, Florida
“There ain’t been no peace in the barnyard, since my little red rooster been gone.” (Howlin’ Wolf)
Howdy…
I’m waiting for my Uber to take me to the Tampa airport at this ungodly hour because when booking my flight home, I obviously was hallucinating or drunk.
New rule for travel: Never, ever, ever book a 6 am flight. Cuz it requires getting up before the roosters, and that is almost never a good idea.
Regardless…
I’ve just spent a week in the Florida panhandle, first visiting my longtime friend Dean Jackson (he of the More Cheese, Less Whiskers podcast)…
… and then attending my colleague Kevin Rogers’ “Copy Chief Live” event.
Where there were raucous times with my other colleagues (like David Deutsch and Lori Haller and Parris Lampopolous and Mike Morgan and many others)…
… plus, as I fully expected and prepared for…
… a TON of fresh insight to living well and happily.
Because that’s what always happens you hang out at rowdy seminars like this. The speakers fill your head with lofty ideas, and your pals re-juice your brain with verve and stories and the sizzling secrets that fuel the best careers out there.
I had a few topics in mind that I wanted to bring up during private conversations, and that’s all the ammo I needed to get things rolling.
In two successive afternoons, for example, apropos of nothing, separate conversations with Dean Jackson and then Aussie James Schramko (who both also spoke at the event)…
… helped me solve two of the biggest problems now facing me in my little biz here.
No, you don’t need to know the particulars. I’ll be writing about them in further posts later on, as things progress beyond the “Holy cow, that’s a great idea!” stage and I start implementing them.
Stay tuned, here in the blog.
But I can assure they are both life-changing.
Cuz that’s what the guys at the top of the food chain in this little niche of the marketing world.
The thing I want to share with you is much more vital to YOUR jouney through life and biz.
Here it is:
Many of the greatest breakthroughs you have will concern “sticking points” that are hampering you reaching the Next Step of your career…
… whatever that Next Step might be.
And I’ve learned over the 40 sometimes-gruesome years of my own career that these sticking points are often…
… just blind spots that you can’t get a bead on.
And yet, just talking about them out loud with your colleagues can jigger loose the solutions.
I always prefer simple, elegant and easy solutions myself…
… and that’s exactly what I often get from hanging out with savvy colleagues.
The simple solutions that zoom me past the sticking points, and get me cooking on high heat again.
I’ve seen entire careers and once-thriving businesses collapse…
… because of problems that were actually easy to solve.
But the owners couldn’t get away from the ruts they’d dug for themselves to see those solutions.
They needed help, and didn’t get it in time.
Unfortunately, this is way too common. So many entrepreneurs and freelancers become too isolated to get the kind of input, advice and brainstorming that are crucial to quickly blowing through trouble.
For me, going to an event is rarely about the actual event.
No. Not by a long shot.
What I’m going for is the pleasure… and the breakthroughs… that come with simply hanging out with colleagues and the fresh wave of new brainiacs that they introduce me to during the event.
That’s the magic, my friend.
Other minds, with all the experience and tactics and breakthroughs they’ve been gathering for their entire careers.
It will blow your mind.
This is why so many top-of-the-game experts still haunt the halls of regular seminars and masterminds.
To get that good stuff that ONLY comes with hanging out with like-minded folks. Away from the bustle and distractions of “normal” biz life.
I just solved two of the biggest sticking points I’ve had for over a year… all in the space of two random conversations with colleagues I trust.
Who were happy to help.
Because I’ve helped them in the past the very same way.
Your network is your greatest resource, and always will be.
Never forget this.
Stay frosty,
John
P.S. The next upcoming Platinum mastermind I’ve hosted for over ten years is sold out, I believe. (Each meeting is limited to just a dozen or so people, because we spend so much time brainstorming and solving the problems for EACH attendee during the two-day event.)
However, you may still be able to squeeze into the following meeting, coming up next spring.
If you want to get a taste of what’s in store for you when you make it to one of these breakthrough-triggering meetings, just pop over here.
No obligation, of course, just for looking.
But you may want to check it out quickly, since spots fill up.
Friday, 10:25am
Reno, NV
“I can’t sleep, cuz my bed’s on fire…” (Talking Heads, “Psycho Killer”)
Howdy…
I’ve been studying happiness just as long as I’ve obsessed on becoming successful in biz…
… and you know what?
The two barely intersect at all.
I wouldn’t want to spend two seconds inside the skin of most of the richest people I know. They’re miserable. They never have enough to fill the bottomless need that fuels their quest for “more”.
But I’m not smug about it.
We all share the same basic malfunctioning default system bug — when we’re sad, we crave happiness…
… and when we’re happy, we’re either unconsciously looking for ways to fuck it up, so we’ll be sad again…
… or we’re terrified that we’re missing something that will take it all away.
Silly humans.
Pure happiness is unsustainable. It’s an outlier emotional state, requiring some fairly substantial hormone dumps from glands that simply can’t supply vast amounts.
Zen thinking tries to get us into a more reasonable contented mode.
Moderation is sustainable pretty much forever, with the right mental tools and a little breath training.
But the human brain loathes moderation, and craves excess.
It’s a bug in the system.
I’m leery of anyone who promises too much joy, especially if they’re selling it.
And yet, the suckers line up to quaff the nasty brew in endless lines.
Being human is hard, in this concrete jungle.
But given the choice between wealth and contentment, I’d choose the latter every time.
Now, that is. As a young man, busy chewing up scenery and consumed with lust, I danced near the edges of bliss and despair as much as possible, and sneered at those who would harsh my wild swings.
Life blows by in a blink, folks.
You’ll never quite figure out the meaning.
But it for sure ain’t unbridled wealth.
Beyond accumulating what you can spend in a hot-blooded lifetime, you’re mostly wasting your time.
You disagree, of course…
Stay frosty,
John
P.S. That blurry photo up top is me, in my arrogant twenties, mocking death. It was Halloween, somewhere in the murky depths of the seventies.
Fun times. We thought they’d last forever, as life continued to lavish energy, fun and health upon our undeserving heads.
Now, the photo is just a reminder to watch my diet, exercise more, and avoid dying as best I can.
Take care of yourself, you.
Saturday, 12:51pm
Rancho Cucamonga, CA
Howdy.
My father passed away two years ago, and because he’d lived such a long and amazing life, he’d outlived anyone in the local area who would have noticed an obituary in the newspaper.
So, I wrote this on Facebook at the time. Nearly everyone who knows me, or my family, and is active in social media was able to see it. In many ways, Facebook has become the new “local newspaper” for things like this…
… and, because of the way your newsfeed works, these kinds of posts are actually seen by more folks than would normally see a published obit.
I’ve decided to republish it here on the blog again, because I still marvel at the man.
For everyone who sent condolences, thank you. I hope, however, that I have adequately explained just how much I appreciate that Pop was around for so long, with his mind intact and vibrant (despite his body slowly falling apart)…
… and that, at 95, the family he left behind prefers to celebrate his long life rather than grieve over his passing. He was ready to go. We’d discussed it for years, he and I, and we were not afraid of the final moment.
Anyway, here’s the post, once again. I’ve written tearful farewells to my mentor, Gary Halbert, to my good pal Scott Haines, and to Steve Jobs (who influenced so many of us) here on the blog… and Pop deserves to stand beside those men in the archives. I can only hope, when the time comes, someone takes the time to a little something for me…Read more…
Saturday, 2:05 pm
Reno, NV
“Hey, you bastards, I’m still here!” (Steve McQueen as Papillon, floating away to freedom…)
Howdy…
I’m re-publishing — for what has become a very popular annual tradition on this blog — one of the more influential posts I’ve ever written.
It’s a good one, worth rereading even if you’ve read it before.
What you’re about to encounter is a slightly tweaked way of looking at the best way to start your new year…
… but this tweak makes all the difference in the world. I’ve heard from many folks that this particular technique finally helped them get a perspective on where they’re at, where they’re going…
… and why they care about getting there.
So, even if you’ve seen this post before… it’s worth another look.
Especially now, as you gaze down the yawning gullet of 2018, trying to wrap your brain around a plan to make the year your bitch.
Read more…
Thursday, 12:26pm
Reno, NV
“Ch-ch-ch-changes, turn and face the strange…” (David Bowie)
Howdy.
Let’s have an uncomfortable discussion, what d’ya say?
Let’s talk about the dirtiest word most adults know: Change.
Here’s the thing about change: Learning how to become a functioning adult is hard, as in requiring every shred of skill, talent, brain power and ability you possess.
And when you “arrive” (however you define it — get a job, get hitched, get pregnant, get out of jail, make a fortune, whatever) you’re kind of exhausted from the effort…
… and you really don’t want to go through all that crap again.
And then the world changes around you.
Dammit.
In our lifetime, that change has been dramatic, jarring, frequent and brutal. Very little of what worked for you even 5 years ago is still viable. The music on the radio sounds like static, people stare at you when you dance, and your job can be done faster and better by machines.
You think I’m talking about the generation just ahead of you, don’t you? All those clueless old fucks slowing you down and mucking up the vibe.
But here’s the truth: No matter how hip you are right now…
Read more…
Tuesday, 4pm
Reno, NV
Photo, clockwise from bottom left: Big Jason Henderson, Brian Kurtz, me, Stan Dahl, Joe Sugarman, and Scott Haines, Las Vegas, after one of our Platinum Group mastermind meetings.
Howdy…
Several years back, Mongo and I were road-dogging with Gary Halbert in Beverly Hills, looking for a new-fangled television option that had just become available…
… allowing you to project video images onto a huge screen in your home. This was ages before 70″ HD TVs were even a glint in a Samsung engineer’s eye.
As usual, Gary needed to find out every detail of this wondrous new contraption. He loved cameras, movies, and all interesting new technology… especially when it promised to entertain him.
Hanging out with Gary meant exploring the world deeply, with gusto.
Also with lots of irreverence.
We parked on Sunset and wandered across the street to an audio/visual store, where the awesome new projector TV was being sold. Several salesmen descended on us immediately, ushering us into a special room displaying the magic.
We stood there for a few moments, watching some soap opera show play out larger than life on the screen. It was pretty impressive.
Mongo and I looked at each and raised our eyebrows. We both had the same thought.
“Um…” said Mongo. “Do you have any porn you can put on? This soap opera crap is pretty boring.”
Gary nearly choked, laughing. I grinned at the salesman, nodding.
He looked sheepish, then grinned back. “Of course,” he said, leaning close. “We watch porn after-hours on this thing all the time…” and he went over to fuss with the video player.
“Score,” said Mongo.
“I’m gonna buy this thing,” said Gary. And he did. But not until after the demonstration.
So we watched some late-nineties grind-and-slobber video for a while (much more intriguing than the soap opera crap) before getting bored and wandering back outside to see if there was better trouble to get into.
Because that’s what we did, Mongo and I, when we were with Gary. A little research, a little exploration, a little visit to the tavern next door to share tall stories and see what else we could get into on this fine sunny day in Southern California.
Mongo is, of course, my great pal and cohort Scott Haines. After I’d done my several years being Gary’s main road dog, Scotty took over. We both were thick as thieves with Gary, traveling around the country to seminars and biz meetings and chewing up scenery in as many different cities as possible. Miami, San Diego, Key West, Phoenix, LA, Orlando, New York city… it was an education in how the U.S. was cobbled together, as much as an ongoing lesson in dealing with clients in every type of market imaginable.
Scotty earned the prized nickname “Mongo” after the Alex Karras character in the movie “Blazing Saddles”. Scotty was a short, broad shouldered, incredibly strong man — with martial arts skills that would have made him fearsome, if he wasn’t also saddled with a heart as big as any man I’ve met. If you were Mongo’s friend, you had someone who would watch your back and sacrifice himself without hesitation when the chips were down.
I valued him as a pal, and also as a colleague. He was a brilliant copywriter (the only way you could get the road dog job with Halbert), and understood the marketing game as well as anyone. He arrived into our world from Tulsa, Oklahoma in the late nineties…
… suffering some serious culture shock moving near Gary in Key West, and then Miami and Hollywood. Sort of a trial-by-fire for a young man eager to tackle the big wide world on his terms.
Scotty and I got along famously, liking each other on first sight. Writers are like that, you know. The “tribe of scribes” is an ancient guild, going back to the beginning of civilization. We’re the dudes and dudettes who get the stories down on paper, who translate the culture into novels and ads, who keep watch over the way history is tracked. It’s a lonely gig, often just you and the blank page…
… and that inherent loneliness bonds us together. We know the drill. We understand what goes into the process, how tough it can be even while seeming like we’re goofing off driving around Hollywood destroying shit.
Writers love to hang with other writers, cuz we never need to answer the question “how do you do it?” We get to skip past the mystery and incredulous quizzing, and just move straight on to our other main job: Drinking and making each other laugh so hard it hurts.
Mongo remained a close friend with Gary, as did I.
And when I decided to become a guru, writing my books and courses and hosting the now-legendary “Copywriting Sweatshop” seminars, I didn’t hesitate to ask Scotty to be my sidekick. He was there for the first three seminars, right beside me, as I faced down 40 marketers who paid $5grand each to have me critique and fix their miserable ad copy. They expected a lot. We delivered more than they ever dreamed possible.
He also was one of the first teachers we hired to honcho a classroom in the Simple Writing System. His students adored him, and he became good friends with many of them.
When I had a problem myself, whether in life or biz, Mongo was one of the first guys I called. Level-headed, despite his shocking appetite for good booze. Fearless when facing problems, despite being a shy introverted giant.
He was the most fun, thoughtful, and generous man I’ve ever known.
And he’s gone. Left this mortal coil today at noon Tulsa-time, surrounded by grieving friends and family, to go see what Gary’s been up to in that Big Marketing Joint in the sky these past ten years.
He was just 46 years old, far too young to leave us so suddenly. The entire writers’ community is in deep shock, emotionally shattered by the passing of a beloved colleague, friend and cohort.
I talked to him the day before he left Austin for Tulsa, to visit with family over Christmas. Twenty-four hours later, he suffered a massive stroke, and was on life support for almost two weeks before his family was convinced by the docs to let him go.
I can still hear his thunderous laughter. We joked and shared old Halbert stories during that call, howling at the misadventures and insanity that wonderful man could generate. It was two longtime pals, talking like we always had. I expected to talk to him again this week, when he got back from the holidays, maybe meet up somewhere for fresh adventures.
Those adventures will have to wait, now.
I’m not a religious man, but I do have a raucous spiritual side, and you can’t tell me I won’t see both Gary and Mongo again, somewhere. In due time.
Life is wondrous, but also heartbreakingly fragile… and you can never predict what the morrow will bring.
Hug your loved ones. Never assume there will be plenty of time later to tell them you love them, plenty of time to enjoy their company, plenty of time left to share your best stories.
Scotty lives on in our hearts, of course. In that ever-growing place where those who have left remain with us. So crowded, that special place.
But that’s what happens when you live large, and embrace life fully. You collect friends, you love them, and sometimes… they have to leave early.
Folks, he’ll never be forgotten…
… but for now…
… Mongo has left the building.
I love and miss you dearly, pal.
Here’s to you.
For the rest of you:
Stay frosty.
John
P.S. Feel free to share your own Mongo stories in the comments here. His very large group of fellow writers have been supporting each other since Scott went down, and while we’re grieving, we’re also laughing through the tears… sharing the funny, embarrassing, wild stories and memories of the big guy.
He was a force of nature. A damned good friend.
And someone we’ll all miss for a very long time…
UPDATE: Big Jason Henderson, one of Scotty’s best pals, set up a GoFundMe site to help with the funeral and hospital expenses Mongo’s family is now faced with.
Go here if you want (and are financially able) to contribute. Doesn’t matter how much. Every penny is appreciated.
You are invited to leave comments and stories on the page. You’ll see that many of Scotty’s cohorts, clients, colleagues and many notorious and famous friends have already done so…
Wednesday, 6:50pm
Reno, NV
“Hey, you bastards, I’m still here!” (Steve McQueen as Papillon, floating away to freedom…)
Howdy…
I’m re-publishing — for what has become a very popular annual tradition on this blog — one of the more influential posts I’ve ever written.
It’s a good one, worth rereading even if you’ve read it before.
What you’re about to encounter is a slightly tweaked way of looking at the best way to start your new year…
… but this tweak makes all the difference in the world. I’ve heard from many folks that this particular technique finally helped them get a perspective on where they’re at, where they’re going…
… and why they care about getting there.
So, even if you’ve seen this post before… it’s worth another look. Especially now, as you gaze down the yawning gullet of 2016, trying to wrap your brain around a plan to make the year your bitch.
This is a critical step for entering any new period of your life. To keep your life moving ahead, you need to set some goals, dude. And most goal-setting tactics, I’ve found, are useless. Worst among them is the traditional New Year’s resolutions (which seldom last through January).
This tactic I’m sharing with you (again) is something I’ve used, very successfully, for decades…
… to reach goals, to clarify the direction of my life, and to change habits. I first shared it in the old Rant newsletter a few years back, and I’ve hauled it out here in the blog on a regular basis. It’s timeless, classic stuff that will never let you down.
So let’s dive in. Here’s the relevant part of the post (slightly edited):
“Goal Setting 101 And
The January 15th Letter”
Yeah, yeah, I know a chat about goals can quickly turn into a boring, pedantic lecture. But then, so can a chat about space flight.
And, in reality, both space flight and your goals are VERY exciting things.
Or should be.
It’s all in the telling.
What I’m not going to discuss are “resolutions”. Those are bogus pseudo-goals that have the staying power of pudding in a microwave.
No. It’s merely a coincidence that I’m suggesting a review of your goals in January, just after the New Year’s supposed fresh start.
I mean…there’s not much else to do, so why not sit down and plan out the rest of your life.
This is, of course, a very damp, cold, and bleak time of year. The depths of winter and discontent.
A good percentage of the population suffers fleeting depression because of lack of sunlight… thanks to the geniuses behind Daylight Savings Time, who arrange for dusk to arrive around 2:30 in the afternoon in these parts.
We also just got slammed with back-to-back-to-back world-class storms, each one dumping a massive load of snow on us. I sent photos to friends, and many emailed back wondering when I’d gone to Antarctica to live.
We had a little cabin fever brewing. Didn’t help when the local PBS channel ran a special on the Donner Party, either. Three feet of snow drifting down, the lights flickering, enough ice on the road to make the SUV sidle like a Red Wing goon slamming someone into the boards.
The safest place was home… but man, the walls start to close in after a few days.
I’m telling you, I had excuses up the yin-yang for allowing my senses to get a little dulled. The natural response is to turn your mind off, and hibernate until March. And I succumbed. Started moping around, binge-watching The Wire on HBO GO instead of reading a book, surfing the Net for stuff I didn’t care about… you know the drill.
I’m sure you’ve done your own version of it now and again.
And I’m also sure you already know that no amount of “buck up” happy talk will mitigate the gloom.
In fact, there are a few enlightened health pro’s who say we should let our bodies wind down every year or so. Get a full system-flush type of cold, crawl under the covers for a few days and let the demons and other bad stuff bubble to the surface. So you can purge the crud. Evacuate the used-up bacteria and tube-clogs out of your pipes, physically. And shoo the whispering monsters out of your head.
We’re not perfect creatures. We need to sleep, we need to recharge our batteries, and we need to stop and get our bearings. At least once a year. So don’t beat yourself up for the occasional down period. We all have them, and the healthiest folks just roll with it. It’s not good to repress this stuff.
It only becomes a problem when you sink into clinical depression. That’s the cold, empty state where nothing looks good, and hope is an absurd memory.
I’ve been there. Several times. The year I turned 30 (for example) I lost my job, my girlfriend and my place to live all within a 45-day stretch.
That shit can wear you down.
Now, I have two things to say about this:
Thing Numero Uno: If you think you’re losing a grip on your mental state, seek professional help. Don’t head straight for pharmaceutical land, though — give “talk therapy” a try with a real, qualified psychotherapist.
Choose this therapist carefully. You’re going to dump every secret you have on them. You may need to plow through a couple to find one that clicks with you (just as you might have to try out several dentists or plumbers to get a good match). (And yes, you should regard this therapist just as you would your dentist — they’re not gonna become your new best friend, but they will bring a professional expertise to the table during the time you need them. And you only need to see them until you get your head straight… which might be a short time or long time. Again — just like you may need serious dental work, or just a cleaning once a year. Figure it out.)
Keep in mind the fact that everyone goes through bumpy emotional states. And that the percentage of people who actually do lose it every year is rather small.
That’s why talking about your problems with someone who has perspective can be so beneficial — the first thing you learn is that you aren’t alone. And what you’re going through is not abnormal.
Most of the time, you’re probably going to be fine. Even when your problems seem overwhelming. There are tools available to help your brain cope. You don’t often come across these tools on your own.
This kind of talk-therapy is one of the few times the “science” of psychology earns its keep — because finding out how others successfully dealt with the same nonsense you’re suffering through can change everything. Seriously — often, just discovering that you’re not alone in what you’re going through, that others have successfully navigated similar troubles, and that the folks who study human behavior and thinking patterns now have really simple (and super-effective) ways to obliterate feeling overwhelmed can solve much of what’s currently holding you back.
A good book to read (while you’re waiting for the spring thaw) is “Learned Optimism” by Martin Seligman. I’ve recommended it before, and it deserves another nod. (The blurb on the back cover, from the New York Times Book Review, starts with “Vaulted me out of my funk…”)
I haven’t read the book in a few years, but I remember the main lesson well. A study, explained up front, stands out: Someone tested the “happiness” quotient of a vast sample of people, including Holocaust survivors.
And it turns out that, at some point in your life, Abraham Lincoln was right — you are as happy as you decide to be.
This is startling news to anyone lost in despair. Because it seems like you’ve been forced to feel that way. With no choice.
But it’s not the case. The happiness study revealed that you can NOT tell from a person’s current attitude what sort of trauma they had gone through earlier in life. People who had suffered horribly could be happy as larks, while silver-spoon never-stubbed-a-toe folks were miserable.
The difference? Attitude. Optimistic people work through setbacks and trauma… while pessimists settle into a funk that can’t be budged.
And it’s a CHOICE. At some point in your life, you choose to either live in gloom or sunlight.
This realization rocks many folk’s boat. Especially the pessimists. They dominate society, politics, business, everything. And they are very protective of their gloom and doom outlook. Invested, heavily, in proving themselves right about the inherent nastiness of life.
Maybe you’re one of ‘em.
If you are, you’re killing yourself, dude.
The guys in lab coats who study this stuff say that heart disease rates are HALF for optimists over pessimists. So, even if you doubt the ability to measure “happiness” — and it is a rather rocky science — you still can’t deny the stats on dropping dead from a gloomy ticker.
Now, I am most assuredly NOT a clear-eyed optimist. I get creepy feelings around people who are too happy all the time.
But I do prefer having a good time, and appreciating the finer things in life (like a deep breath of cold alpine air, or the salty whip of an ocean wave around my ankles, or a secret smile from the wonderful woman I live with).
I’m just good at balancing out the bad with the good.
Being in direct response helps. Lord knows, there’s a LOT of bad with every piece of good news in this wacky biz.
Gary Halbert and I had a term we used for years: We’re “pessimistic optimists”. (Or maybe we’re optimistic pessimists. I forget.)
How does that work? Easy.
We expected horrible atrocities at every turn… and rejoiced when we defied Fate and unreasonable success rained down on our undeserving heads. We grooved on the good stuff in life… and just nodded sagely at the bad stuff and moved past it as quickly as possible. Maybe cop a lesson or two as we scurried by the wreckage.
If you focus on the bad things that can go wrong, you’ll never crawl out of bed in the morning.
When you finally realize that — not counting health problems — pretty much everything bad that business, or relationships, or politics can throw at you will not kill you… then you can begin to relax.
And eagerly court the Unknown by starting another project.
Have you ever had your heart broken? Hurts like hell, doesn’t it. Feels like your life is over.
Well, from my perspective, sitting here at “way past 50” and pretty darned happy, all those romances-gone-wrong that broke my heart long ago look just plain silly now. And my resulting deep depressions — where I was sure my life was over — are just tiresome lessons I had to get through.
Not a one of those ladies was worth a burp of angst. They were fine people, I’ll agree to that. A few were exceptional (and very skilled at certain man-pleasing arts).
But worth a Shakespearean suicide?
No way.
It’s taken me a while, but I’m now a certified realist. My youthful idealism has drained away, and my brushes with hate-everything-cuz-it’s-not-perfect dogma never took.
And guess what? Contrary to what an embarrassingly huge number of self-righteous folks would have you believe… being a realist has not dented my passion for life one little bit. In fact, it has opened up a whole new world of unexplainable spirituality (which cannot be contained within any formal religion).
I’m not against religion. Let’s have no “save my soul” emails here. One of my favorite friends to argue with has a doctorate in theology. And I have many other friends committed to various belief systems ranging from fundamentalist to Buddhist to humanist. We get along because, on a deep level, we understand that true spirituality transcends whatever way you choose to express it or appreciate it.
I loathe black-and-white views of the world. It’s a shame that our great country has descended to this “you’re nuts if you don’t agree with me” mentality… but it’s part of the pendulum that’s been swinging back and forth ever since we left the jungle.
The far edges of our institutions — political, religious, cultural, all of it — are in spiritual and emotional “lock down”. They’re sure they’re right, they’re positive you’re wrong, and neither facts nor logic will sway their position.
Mushy liberals seem astonished that anyone would ever not love them, or want to destroy their culture. Repressed conservatives seem intent on crushing everyone who pisses them off (and that’s a lot of people).
It’s “whatever” versus “blind obedience”. And neither works so hot in the real world. I have no use for dogma, or idealism, or punishingly-harsh rules that have been cooked up by hypocrites.
Hey — I’m in no position to tell anyone how to live their life. I’ve screwed up plenty, and if I have any wisdom at all, it’s only because I’ve survived some truly hairy situations.
But I don’t believe anyone else is in a position to tell you how to live, either. That’s gotta be your decision.
And it’s a damn hard one to make.
Fortunately, while I can’t tell you how to live, I can move some smooth (and proven) advice in your direction. Take it or leave it… but give it a listen anyway, cuz my track record on successful advice-giving is fairly impressive.
And I’m telling you that having a hateful, brooding attitude will stunt your growth. It will make you a smaller person, a less-wise person, an older and feebler person. And you won’t grow. Not spiritually, not physically, not emotionally. Not in your business life, either.
Most people don’t want to grow, anyway. Growth only comes from movement and change… and the vast majority of the folks walking the earth with us today are terrified of change.
You can’t blame them, really. Change is a form of death. Whatever was before, dies. And whatever comes next must be nurtured with devotion and sacrifice.
That’s hard. That’s a hard way to live, always dying and being reborn.
And because it’s hard, it’s avoided.
Well, screw that.
I suspect, if you’re reading this, you are not afraid of change. But you may not yet understand the power that REALLY giving yourself to change offers.
And that brings us to…
Thing Numero Dos: Goals are all about change.
That’s a subtle point many people gloss over. Rookie goal-setters often get stuck on stuff like quitting smoking, or vague concepts like “become a better person”.
Or “get rich”.
That seldom works. Goals need to be specific… and they need to involve profound change in order to take hold.
Halbert often talked about “image suicide” — the necessity of killing and burying the “self” you are so heavily invested in, before you can move to a new level of success.
I see this all the time in my consultations. Biz owners refuse to do even slightly risky marketing, for fear of damaging their “reputations.”
And my question to them is: What reputation?
Unless you’re the top dog in your niche, no one gives a rat’s ass about what you think or do. No one is looking at your marketing for inspiration or condemnation, because you aren’t the guy to look at.
No. What these scaredy-cats are talking about when they say “reputation” is what their family and friends think of them. And that’s a sure sign of a losing attitude. That ain’t Operation MoneySuck.
My colleague Ron LeGrand, the real estate guru, is one of the best natural salesmen I’ve ever met. The guy understands the fundamental motivating psychology of a prospect at a master’s level. And he knows that one of the major obstacles he faces in every sale… is what the prospect’s spouse (usually the wife) will say.
She can nix the sale with a sneer. Or she can nix it in the prospect’s head, as he imagines that sneer.
Ron counters both sides of the objection expertly. He encourages the prospect to get his spouse involved in the decision, so she becomes invested in it. Or, he suggests waiting until the first big check comes in… and letting the money explain to her about what you’re up to.
This is the reality of most people’s lives. As much as they want what you offer… they are terrified of making a mistake. Cuz they’ll pay dearly for it at home.
It’s a huge deal-killer.
That’s why you include lots of “reason why” copy in your pitch — to give your buyer ammunition for explaining his decision to the doubters in his life. However, as Ron knows, the best (and simplest) “reason why” is results.
Money, as they say, talks.
The top marketers seldom give a moment’s thought to what a risky tactic might do to their “reputation”. They don’t really care what people think about them. You can’t bank criticism.
I know many marketers who are involved in projects they are passionate about… but which bore their spouses to tears. Some (like Howard Stern’s former wife) are even deeply embarrassed. But they don’t complain too much. Because the money’s so good.
Aw, heck. I could go on and on about this. The story of Rodale’s shock and dismay at the brutally-honest ad I wrote for their timid “sex book” is a great example. They refused to mail it, because of their “reputation”. Yet, after it accidentally did mail, and became a wildly-successful control for 5 years, they suddenly decided their reputation could handle it after all.
The people who get the most done in life are all extreme risk-takers. They embrace change, because growth is impossible without it.
But you don’t go out and start changing things willy-nilly.
You need goals.
And you need a plan.
Now, there are lots of books out there that tell you how to set goals. I recently found, in a moldy banker’s box, the ad for Joe Karbo’s book “The Lazy Man’s Way To Riches” that I’d responded to back in 1982. The exact ad! With the order form torn out… it was the first direct mail pitch I’d ever encountered, and it changed my life forever. Joe’s book was essentially a treatise on setting goals. And it’s good.
It was a wake-up call for me. I’m having that crinkly old ad framed. Can’t imagine why I kept it, but I did. Pack-rat riches.
If you can’t find that particular book, there are dozens of newer goal-setting guides on the shelves. But they’re all based on the same formula:
1. Decide what you want.
2. Write it down, and be specific.
3. Read the list often, imaging as you read that you have already achieved each goal.
What this does is alter the underpinnings of your unconscious. When one of your goals is to earn a million bucks this year, and that goal burns bright in the back of your mind, each decision you make will be influenced.
So, for example, you won’t accept a permanent job somewhere that pays $50,000 a year. Cuz that isn’t going to help you attain your goal.
The problem is this: To earn a mil in a year, you need to average around $50,000 every two weeks. This is why it can take a while to get your goal-setting chops honed. As I’ve said many times, most folks don’t know what they want.
And they aren’t prepared for the changes necessary to get what they want, once they do decide on a goal.
What kind of guy earns $50,000 every two weeks, like clockwork? It takes a certain level of business savvy to create that kind of steady wealth. It doesn’t fall into your lap.
What kind of guy makes a windfall of a million bucks in one chunk? That’s another kind of savvy altogether.
In that same moldy banker’s box, I also found a bunch of my early goal lists. And I’m shocked at how modest my aims were. At the time — I was in the first months of going out on my own, a totally pathetic and clueless rookie — I couldn’t even imagine earning fifty K a year. My first goal was $24,000 as a freelancer. And to score a better rental to live in. Find a date for New Year’s. Maybe buy a new used car.
Listen carefully: I met those goals. As modest as they were, it would have been hard not to. I needed them to be modest, because I was just getting my goal-setting chops together. And I wasn’t sure if I was wasting my time even bothering to set goals.
Let me assure you, it was NOT a waste of time.
The lists I found covered several later years, too. And what’s fascinating is that many of the more specific goals I set down were crossed out — I wanted those goals, but didn’t feel confident about obtaining them.
So I crossed them out, and forgot about them.
A couple of decades later, I realize that I’ve attained every single one of those “forgotten” goals. The big damn house, the love of my life, the professional success, even the hobbies and the guitars and the sports car.
I’m stunned. This is powerful voodoo here.
The universe works in mysterious ways, and you don’t have to belong to a religion to realize this. The whole concept of “ask and you shall receive, seek and you shall find, knock and the door will be opened” was well-known by successful people long before Luke and Matthew wrote it down.
The keys are action. Movement.
Ask, seek, knock.
These simple actions will change your life forever.
Back to making a million in a year: Some guys know what they need to do to make this goal real. They’ve done it before, or they’ve come close.
Setting the goal is serious business for them… because they are well aware of the tasks they’ve assigned themselves. Take on partners, put on seminars, create ad campaigns, build new products. Get moving on that familiar path.
I’ve known many people who started the year with such a goal… who quickly modified it downward as the reality of the task became a burden. Turns out they didn’t really want the whole million after all. Half of that would suffice just fine. To hell with the work required for the full bag of swag.
Other guys don’t know what they need to do to earn a mil. So their goal really is: Find out what I need to do to earn a million bucks.
Their initial tasks are to ask, seek, and knock like crazy. And change the way they move and act in the world. Because they must transform themselves into the kind of guy who earns a million bucks in one year.
Right now, they aren’t that guy.
So, for example, reading “The 7 Habits Of Highly Effective People” suddenly becomes an “A” task, while remodeling the kitchen gets moved to the back of the burner. Sharpening your ability to craft a killer sales pitch becomes more important than test-driving the new Porsche.
More important, even, than dating Little Miss Perfect. And test-driving her new accessories.
Tough choice?
Nope. When you get hip to the glory of focused change, you never lament leaving the “old” you behind.
It will be hard, sometimes, no doubt about it. Especially when you discover your old gang no longer understands you, or mocks your ambition. They liked the old, non-threatening you. They want him to come back.
But you’ve changed. And hot new adventures are going to take up a lot more of your time now.
My trick to setting goals is very simple:
Every January 15th, I sit down and write myself a letter, dated exactly one year ahead.
And I describe, in that letter, what my life is like a year hence. (So, in 2016, I dated the letter to myself as January 15, 2017.)
It’s a subtle difference to the way other people set goals. Took me a long time to figure it out, too.
For many years, I wrote out goals like “I live in a house on the ocean”, and “I earn $24,000 a year”. And that worked. But it was like pushing my goals.
Writing this letter to myself is more like pulling my goals. For me, this works even better. Every decision I make throughout the year is unconsciously influenced, as I am pulled toward becoming the person I’ve described.
But here’s where I do it very differently: My goals are deliberately in the “whew” to “no friggin’ way” range. Mega-ambitious, to downright greedy.
There’s a sweet spot in there — doable, if I commit myself, but not so outrageous that I lose interest because the required change is too radical.
I’m pretty happy with myself these days. Took me a long, hard slog to get here, and I earned every step. And I want to continue changing, because I enjoy change. But I don’t need to reinvent myself entirely anymore.
So here’s what makes this ambitious goal-setting so effective: I don’t expect to REACH most of them.
In fact, I’m happy to get half of what I wanted.
There’s a ton of psychology at work there. The person I describe a year away often resembles James Bond more than the real me. Suave, debonair, flush, famous, well-traveled… and in peak health. I hit all the big ones.
However, long ago I realized that trying to be perfect was a sure way to sabotage any goal I set. Perfectionists rarely attain anything, because they get hung up on the first detail that doesn’t go right.
Being a good goal-setter is more like successful boxing — you learn to roll with the punches, cuz you’re gonna get hit.
You just stay focused on the Big Goal. And you get there however you can.
I’m looking at last year’s letter. I was a greedy bastard when I wrote it, and I didn’t come close to earning the income figure I set down.
Yet, I still had my best year ever.
And — here’s the kicker — I would NOT have had such a great year, if I wasn’t being pulled ahead by that letter. There were numerous small and grand decisions I made that would have gone another way without the influence of what I had set down.
I didn’t travel to the places I had listed. But I did travel to other, equally-fun places. I didn’t finish writing that third biz book. But I did position it in my head, and found the voice I want for narration. That’s a biggie. That was a sticking point that would have kept the novel from ever getting finished.
Now, it’s on power-glide.
There’s another “hidden” benefit to doing this year-ahead letter: It forces you to look into the future.
A lot of people make their living peering ahead and telling everyone else what to expect. Most do a piss-poor job of it — weathermen are notorious for getting it wrong, as are stock market analysts, wannabe trend-setters, and political prognosticators.
Yet, they stay in business. Why? Because the rest of the population is terrified of looking into the future. That would require some sincere honesty about their current actions… since what the future holds is often the consequence of what you’re doing right now.
If you’re chain-smoking, chasing street hookers, and living on doughnuts, your future isn’t pretty. For example.
Or if you’ve maxed out all your credit cards, and haven’t done your due diligence to start bringing in moolah, your future isn’t nice, either.
No one can “see” into the future for real. But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try. In fact, it’s easy, when you have a little experience in life.
Things you do today will have consequences tomorrow. If you put up a website today for a product, and you do everything you can to bring traffic to it and capture orders… your consequence can be pretty and nice.
Sure, you may get hit by a bus while fetching the morning paper… but letting that possibility scare you off of trying for something better is for pessimists (who are scheduled for early checkout).
You have enormous control over your future.
And once you realize that, you can set out to start shaping it.
Stay frosty,
John
P.S. If you’re one of those people who’ve been skimming blogs like this… never reading anything carefully and slowly, and digesting what’s on the page… then I have one more suggestion for you: Stop doing that.
Most of the uber-successful folks I know (and I know a lot) have both skimming skills AND “deep reading” skills. And they know when to use them. You skim to get overviews, which may turn out to be flawed (because you missed something crucial in your skimming). You deep-read when you want to absorb something important, and you need to make the impression of what you read stick in your brain.
Right now, there are readers here who should be seriously considering the courses and opportunities I offer in the right-hand column of this blog. This is the stuff that has launched freelance careers, transformed biz owners into ad-writing monsters, and armed both rookie and veteran entrepreneurs with the fundamentally awesome skills of success. Quickly, and with the surety of proven-in-the-real-world tactics and advice.
So stop screwing around. If you need further help in getting your career going, or in crafting the kind of marketing that will boost profits through the roof… then consider the offerings on this page an essential task in your new list of goals. This is the real deal. No fluff, no nonsense — just honest, solid, proven stuff from a respected veteran of biz success.
Meanwhile, get busy with your January 15th letter.
P.P.S. One of your main goals, if you’re a serious entrepreneur and you haven’t mastered slamming out world-class copy yet for your bad self… is to GET bad-ass at it as soon as humanly possible. I don’t care how you do it — find a mentor, start experimenting with one of the many courses or coaching programs out there…
… or, as I recommend, just join our mastermind. We’re going into our ninth year of it, so we’re doing something right. To get the details, go here.
Give yourself at least the OPTION of deciding yes-or-no, with some background, by going to this page now and seeing what’s up. At the very least, read some of the testimonials, to get a taste of how powerful the transformation in your life and career can be when you finally get hip to the stuff no one told you about before.
I’ll be checking into the comments here, if you have questions about any of this…
