Category Archives for Marketing

Avoid The Void

sunset

Monday, 11am
Reno, NV
Facts are stupid things.” (Ronald Reagan, ’88 GOP convention)

Howdy…

Well, that was fun.

Over 650 comments on that last quiz so far (with a bullet).  Some really good responses, too.

Also some really out-there ones, which always makes for giddy reading.

The main thing, of course, is that so many folks put on their Thinking Caps and went for it.  As I’ve said before: You win just by trying with this kind of brain stumper.

Anyway…

… we have a winner.  I’ll let you know who it was in a minute.

First, let’s relieve the tension and reveal the answer already.

Or at least head in that direction.  It’s probably worth noting that only a tiny handful of the comments were on the right path.

The question was vague, on purpose.  This is high-end street-level psychology…

… and one of the main features of this kind of advanced salesmanship is that it is NOT easily understood by most people.

In fact, you’ve likely encountered the answer to this quiz before in your life… but because it didn’t “fit” with your intuition and belief about “how things work”, it didn’t stick.

Most of what classic salesmen know about people runs counter to what the majority calls  “common sense”.

This is startling to rookie marketers.  Confusing.  Disorienting.  Challenges long-held beliefs about the nobility of human endeavor and the lofty inclinations of the human brain.

Thus, we saw long sub-threads in the comments that ignored the entire concept of a “glitch” in people’s thinking…

… and instead dove into all kinds of elaborate explanations of how a successful sales pitch might smoothly proceed with dignity and logic.

It’s good to have these discussions, if you desire to get anywhere in marketing.

I, too, had trouble getting into the minds of my prospects at first.

This is why I jumped on every opportunity that arose, early in my career, to hang out and grill every “street wise” marketer I ran into.

Cuz those guys knew how to SELL.

No theory.  Just experience (and the bank accounts to prove it).

This group included:

… Jay Abraham and Gary Halbert (both of whom had door-to-door selling experience where, if they didn’t make the sale, they didn’t eat that day)…Read more…

Quiz #7. Hot New Prize, Too…

exlim-6-09-108

Thursday, 10:11pm
Reno, NV
“Ain’t it hard when you discover that he wasn’t really where it’s at… after he took from you everything he could steal?” (Bob Dylan, “Like A Rollin’ Stone”)

Howdy…

This is gonna be good.

And a whole lot tougher than any previous quiz I’ve given.

I’ll explain the prize in just a sec.

First, the set-up for the question:

I find it shocking that so many wanna-be-rich marketers out there still think the question of “short copy vs. long copy” is unsettled online.

I can tell you this: For the top guys — the ones sloughing off the vast majority of the moolah being made by entrepreneurs on the Web — it’s settled.

Whether you’re primarily using video, or email, or websites, or social media…

… the Main Big Damn Rule for getting people to part with their hard-earned money in trade for what you offer hasn’t changed since the first caveman traded up to a new cave with a view for a slab of mastodon meat:

The more you tell…

… the more you sell.

Hey — I love a good argument.  Don’t get me wrong.

And I’m always open to hearing someone out on this subject.

I realize that — for many people unsullied by actual experience in the biz world — it’s just plain tempting to believe that the rules of the universe have suddenly changed.

And you no longer have to be so… vulgar… to make a sale anymore.

Because, you know… the Web has changed everything.  Social networking has somehow mysteriously short-circuited the old skepticism, doubt, and fear of getting “taken” that has marred the smooth exchange of money in the past.

Now, hey, we’re all buddies on Twitter and Facebook!

Mi casa es su casa.

How much do you need?  Here, take my wallet…

Naw.

For anyone paying attention to what the entrepreneurs actually making money online are doing…Read more…

The Art Of Bombing

improv

Thursday, 11:49am
Tampa Bay, FL
“What kind of music do you play here, Bob?” “Oh, we got both kinds. Country and western.” (Bob, the bar owner, and Jake Blues in “The Blues Brothers”)

Howdy…

Each year around July 4th, I like to post something on the blog about the First Amendment to the Constitution.

The part about free speech remains a protection that Americans enjoy (most of the time)… while much of the rest of the world refuses to even consider the concept.

Even otherwise enlightened joints like Europe have an itchy relationship with free speech.

Hell, we couldn’t get such a protection passed here in the States now.  If it hadn’t been wedged into the Constitution by Jefferson in the Bill of Rights 240 years ago, it would still be an unrealized pipe dream of writers and deep thinkers everywhere.

Make no mistake:  Your freedom to write blogs without government interference… as well as your right to use words like “fuck” to your heart’s content while making your point… is protected (mostly).

And this freedom is what fueled America’s dominance in stand up comedy.

Hey, don’t scoff.  Satire, ridicule, and funny stuff very much qualifies as deep thinking.

In fact, it’s how public opinion gets changed the fastest.

And this freedom has been denied to almost every human who has walked the planet in our history.

So don’t take it lightly.  Your ancestors would have killed for such a seemingly obvious privilege (and both did kill to get it, and die defending it).

The Man don’t like free speech.

Bugs him.  Irritates his sense of authority and moral dominance.

Well, fuck The Man.

For every writer who was or will be jailed for writing the truth (as he or she sees it)…Read more…

[Quiz] Okay, So What’s Your NEXT Step?

exlim-6-09-105

Saturday, 8:42pm
Reno, NV
“Look Dave, I can see you’re really upset about this. I honestly think you ought to sit down calmly, take a stress pill, and think things over. (HAL to astronaut Dave in “2001”)

Howdy…

Okay, let’s do a quickie quiz, what d’ya say?

It’s Saturday evening, after all… and I just got my ass whupped by Michele at Scrabble (her first win, ever, in 10 years of trying) (and I don’t expect to ever hear the last of it anytime soon).

(What’s the time limit on doing the “Ass Whup” dance, mocking your partner, anyway?)

So, to keep my mind off the misery of such a wrenching loss (she accidentally used all 7 letters in her third turn, and that bonus 50 points is what beat me), I’m hiding in my office.

I’ve got maybe 10 minutes before I have to come out and face more taunting and jublilation.

Thus, a quick blog post.  (“Get out of here!  I gotta work…”)

I’m giving a prize away, of course.

Let’s se… how about a fresh copy of “Kick-Ass Copywriting Secrets of a Marketing Rebel” to the first right answer.

I’ve got a nice new one burning a hole on the shelf across from my desk.  It’s got your name on it, Mr/Ms Winner.  I’ll sign it, and have Diane ship it out asap.

Sound good?

Okay.  Here’s the quiz:

The most common question I get from entrepreneurs who are stuck on some part of their marketing…Read more…

Photo Orgy

casio-download-9-08-0231

Thursday, 10:06pm
Reno, NV
“There are no rules for good photographs, there are only good photographs.” (Ansel Adams)

Howdy…

I grew up in a photo-loving family.

Pop still has his trusty Kodak folding camera — a true antique now — and I cannot yet bring myself to dig through that box in the garage with all my old cameras (cuz I know it’s time to start assigning them new fates somewhere else).

I swear to you I still have a box of Polaroid film in the butter drawer of the fridge. Might even be the last batch they ever made (and R.I.P. Polaroid, dear departed friend).

Mom was the photo archivist of the family, and even as other families gravitated toward 16mm film, I retained a purist’s preference for the snapshot over the home movie.

(Side note: I remember meeting someone 20 years ago who mentioned that they were on video from the moment of their birth, and it was unsettling.

Now, it’s rare to meet anyone under the age of 30 who isn’t cataloged on film through their entire childhood. I can’t even imagine watching myself being born. I have a hard time watching old seminar footage of me from ten years ago, for cryin’ out loud.

Anyone out there hauling around a library of self-referenced film with them? What’s it like?)

I believe I fell in love with photography the moment I saw my first photograph… and realized it was actually a moment in time captured forever.

And I formed some very intense ideas about what makes a “good” photograph as a third-grader thumbing through the still-amazing stack of Nazi photos Pop brought home from his stint as a rifleman during WWII.

(There’s no way to tell for sure, but those two dozen shots seem to be a German officer’s front-line cache of “Here’s what I did during the War” snapshots. Fascinating subject material that forced us to imagine what the story actually was behind those uniformed men… especially the one with the open bullet wound in the dorsal lat.)

As I grew up, I would become captivated by very few photos in the piles coming back from the drugstore of family and friends and pets and outings.

I never questioned why I found those few snapshots so iconic.

Later, one of my first jobs in advertising was overseeing the photography for a computer supply catalog every quarter.

That job meant gathering all the equipment (cables, monitors, furniture, floppies, etc) and spending a week or so with a professional photographer in Palo Alto trying to make plastic crap look good.

(I won’t bore you with the hassle that pre-digital photography presented — the need to refrigerate film, manually load it, and nurture it like a fragile duck egg until it could be color-separated and made “camera-ready”, which means ready for the printer to fuss with during the offset process of applying wave after wave of ink until the correct color was achieved.)

(Okay, sorry, I think I just bored you there.)

Anyway… I learned a lot about the technical aspects of photography (like using mashed potatoes as a substitute for ice cream, cuz the real treat wouldn’t survive under the required hot lights for a good shot).

Pro photographers in the ad field earned big bucks. They knew the voodoo.

But you know what?Read more…

Boithday Star-Crossed Ruminations

Monday, 4:30pm
Reno, NV
“Yeah, we’re gonna have a party, party…” Beatles, again

Howdy.

Yep.

The Dude’s another year older.

As to how much wiser I’ve gotten… well, the jury’s still out.

So here’s my question to you: Do you buy astrology’s promise…

… and if so, do you think there’s no better sign to be born under than yours?

(And you gotta cut me total slack here, cuz it’s my birthday. So no sniping.)

My confession: There is, clearly, no rational reason to be into astrology. It’s basic premise — that the celestial arrangement floating overhead at the moment of your birth somehow influences how your life progresses — can be demolished by a fifth grader.

Empirically-minded friends are aghast at even a hint from anyone that they’re paying serious attention to the “star-crossed lovers” concept of looking for meaning in the real-world soap opera we all live in.

And my more spiritually-minded friends take guilty pleasure, anyway, in getting their horoscopes professionally done every few years.

Me?

I don’t see any reason for astrology to actually “work”.

Nor do I see any overwhelming evidence that attempts to read meaning into metaphysical matters are all bullshit.

I am officially a fence-sitter.

It’s like chiropractic, in many ways. I know that if you examine the roots of the practice, you’ll discover that the pioneers were completely nuts… and without question absolutely wrong about what adjusting muscles and bones could accomplish.

And yet, I first visited a chiropractor in my late twenties, when I was having horrific migraines every week. (Not headaches, but debilitating, brain-curdling migraines. We’re talking 8 hours in a fetal position in a dark room, wanting to die.)

My friends begged me not to go. They considered physically restraining me.

But I was having an aura one day — peripheral clouding of my vision — which meant I had about an hour before finding a cave-like refuge to ride out the coming pain…

… and I just decided to screw all the bad PR about chiropractic, and give it a try.

Nothing else had worked.

And this doc — an old-school Palmer type, with archaic electric gizmos cluttering his office — simply adjusted my neck (took all of 30 seconds)…

… and the aura vanished.

The migraine never arrived. And, though I had been leveled by them weekly for years at that point, I never had another one for two years.

When they did appear again, I found another chiro, and they stopped again.

Haven’t had one in twenty years now. First thing I do when I move to a new city is find a chiro I like. (And no, I don’t go very frequently. I’m always on a “call as needed” basis, and never go in unless I’m feeling those familiar-but-vague warning sensations.)

So, you can “prove” to me that chiropractic is bullshit all you want.

I don’t care what you come up with. I’ve got all the proof I need in my non-scientific, totally subjective personal experience.

Same with astrology.

I have no idea how to argue for it to anyone else. Back in college, some chick did my chart… and, though she didn’t know a thing about me, just nailed my past and predicted some very near-future events with jaw-dropping accuracy.

And — even stranger, to me — years after my college career, I discovered that the core group of people I kept in touch with…

… were all Sagittarians. Born in December. And we all get along like twins. And did so before we realized we shared a sign.

I realize this is hardly earth-shaking news.

But I have not been able to rationally put away my suspicions that astrology may have something going for it… something way beyond my ability to understand.

I’m a psychology grad. I’ve spent a lifetime examining the mysteries of human personality and interaction… which has come in handy as a salesman, let me tell ya.

As a hard-core direct response dude, I care more about results than theory.

I cannot always explain to someone why a certain tactic works in marketing. As an old-school copywriter, I learned early to listen to my gut when approaching new markets with a pitch… and sometimes, your gut will deliver advice that runs counter to every sane, logical, and rational direction available.

And to insist to a client — when there’s big money on the line — that your gut is right… even as other experts are tearing out hair and rending clothes at the very thought of doing what you suggest…

… well, after a while (if you’re successful), you start to appreciate the Mysterious Forces floating around us.

There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy.

Even so, I don’t make any hard decisions based on astrology. I just like to flirt with it.

I like to visit psychics, too, every few years. Back when I was studying street-level salesmanship (hanging out with 3-card Monte experts and other sleight-of-hand masters), I became aware of “cold reading” skills (gaming the gullibility of a stranger using physical clues and “tells”)… and I like to see how experts continue to use them.

A good psychic is, most often, a bullshitter of immense talent. They practice their craft as well as a great poker player. (And you know the mantra of playing poker, don’t you? “If you look around the table, and you don’t know who the sucker is… then YOU’RE the sucker.”)

However…

… a couple of times…

… well, let’s just say that certain psychics I couldn’t nail as cold-readers… laid some heavy duty observations on me that turned out to be shockingly accurate. Just like the amateur astrologer back in college.

Some people just wave all this nonsense away, appalled that anyone with half a brain could even tolerate its existence.

To me, though, it’s like love.

Have you ever tried to explain love to someone who’s never been there?

There is a case to be made that it’s just a complex (yet chartable) series of chemical and mechanical reactions in your body and brain.

A glandular event, genetically engineered to propagate the species.

But, as a human being, that doesn’t come close to adequately explaining love, does it.

One of the biggest advantages I’ve experienced as a professional ad writer…

… is that I get to dally with all this metaphysical, spooky, out-there stuff to my heart’s content.

And, oddly, it actually provides killer insight when selling stuff to other humans.

Cuz we’re a wacky blob of biology and life-force, lemme tell ya.

And yeah… as a proud Sagittarius, born at 4:44pm on a Saturday with the moon in Leo (and living with a Scorpio who keeps me challenged and on my toes)…

… I can say that I honestly feel sorry for anyone not born under this sign.

How do you Taurus’ and Gemini’s live with yourselves?

😉

Okay. Rumination over.

Love to hear your thoughts.

Stay frosty,

John Carlton, b-day boy

And The Winner Is…

Monday, 8:23pm
Reno, NV
“May I have the envelope, please…”

Howdy,

A very big “Thank You” to everyone who sent in a response to last week’s query.

The rather large number of well-thought-out, specific answers in the comment section was augmented by another pile of responses sent to my private inbox.

I’m truly humbled, guys.

That was a deluge of good stuff.

The question I’d asked last Thursday was (more or less): What’s keeping you (or kept you, if you did finally succeed) from learning to write copy… the one obviously essential skill mastered by all the top marketers?

I knew I’d get a good crop of answers.

A blog like this — which is followed worldwide — is just a treasure-chest of good information and insight.

So, again… thanks for writing.

You see, I had my own ideas of what the problem is among the biz owners and entrepreneurs who stubbornly resist my charm and offers of personal mentoring.

I mean, this is what I do — figure out the motivations and hidden psychology of target markets.

However, even a veteran adman (and I’ve got over 25 years in the front-line trenches) never wants to rely ONLY on his gut instincts.

Not when the stakes are so high.

I’ll give you a breakdown on the answers that came in. They were ALL good.

However… I’d originally offered a reward for the best post (“best” meaning the one that gave voice to the most insightful reasons for dilly-dallying on getting good at writing).

And that reward idea went out the window the first day.

Too many good posts.

So…

… I’ve decided to annoint FIVE winners. All will recieve a brand spankin’ new copy of the updated “Kick-Ass Copywriting Secrets of a Marketing Rebel”. (My assistant, Diane, will email you directly this week, and arrange delivery.)

And yet, we’re all winners here.

Because the sheer insight to the marketing wisdom inherent in any specific (though decidedly unscientific) research like this… is worth a FORTUNE to anyone smart enough to pay attention.

Before I announce the winners…

… let’s see how the answers broke down into categories:

The top most common responses as to why people resist learning how to write:

1. They see copywriting as “too hard” or they’re just scared to even try.

2. They just don’t know what to do. (Almost tied for number one.)

3. Time — no perceived time to learn it, plus info-overload (too much info, which causes brain freeze).

4. Close behind (and this is something I’ve been hearing for years): Anger at the “hype” of salesmanship that seems inherent in long copy ads… and a shyness about trying to sell at all. (Some folks get really pissed off at the persuasive tactics required to cause money to exchange hands.)

5. Lastly: A total disconnect and denial that it’s something they need, combined with general ADD about running a biz.

Just two people mentioned cost. Four wanted more blueprints, or templates.

Veeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeery interesting.

My instant analysis (and I’ll be ruminating on these responses for a while): This range of answers…

… sort of jibes with my original gut feelings on the subject.

Yet, the depth of the resistance is something I dearly needed to be alerted to.

I totally understand the sense of not knowing what to do, or where to turn. That “drifting” state is where I lived my entire life… right up to the epiphany I had that led me to jump into freelancing.

As a hippie, in my weird youth, I abhored capitalism… and so I also feel a distant empathy with folks who find selling creepy and distasteful.

And that feeling of being overwhelmed by info — too much from too many guru’s, and no way to easily choose which to follow… well, that’s a chronic state for even many veteran (and successful) biz owners.

At nearly every marketing seminar I’ve been to in the last couple of years… time management and avoiding being overwhelmed is the number one topic.

There’s a strong sense that the “right” path, or “right” set of skills (with the right teacher) is out there… but it’s exhausting trying to find it… and even more draining trying to absorb it once/if you find what you’re looking for.

The big one — the most oft-cited response — was the perception that learning to write is “hard”.

This is VERY understandable, especially in this country. By the time most Americans are seniors in high school, they’ve had any affection for the written word beaten out of them.

And this is a shame that reverberates throughout the biz world.

Teachers who force students to crank out bullshit essays on bullshit subjects should be fired.

Writing is something most humans can (and should) take to easily. Ask a bored, distracted sophomore to write out the reason he should win four tickets to the upcoming AD/DC reunion tour (or pick your own must-see event… Green Day? Madonna? Clarkson? Steely Dan? Larry The Cable Guy?)…

… and he’ll fill fourteen pages in a breathless rush, stopping only when his pen runs out of ink.

Same with love letters home from overseas, heated threads on Web chat boards, even extended texting. (I’ve seen Twit posts from some of the guys I follow approach novel-length, all in bursts of multiple 140-character tweets…)

It’s not the actual writing that’s hard.

Naw.

It’s the brain-numbing process required to fuel what you write with meaning and persuasion.

That’s what mucks up the enthusiasm.

This is easy to understand…

… and SOLVING this dilemna has obsessed me for decades.

For a certain percentage of people Ive taught, the mastering of the process is as easy as kicking open a stuck door. BAM! And you’re in.

For others, however, it takes some focused, hands-on mentoring.

It’s still not “hard”, though, in my experience.

It’s just… a slightly uneven path that requires a little guidance.

And the friendly hand of a mentor, who’s invested in your progress.

I used to offer that, in the now-gone “Insider’s Club” I created when I first became a guru.

You paid a small amount each year, and we became email buddies. I watched over you, critiquing your efforts and smacking you (virtually, of course) upside the head when you blundered.

The number of people I pumped through that original “Insider’s Club” include many of the most famous, filthy-rich marketers out there today. (As well as a whole mob of newly-minted guru’s in their field.)

People beg me to bring that “Insider’s Club” back… but it was just too much work on my part.

There’s only so much of me to go around, you know.

So… no. I simply cannot do something like that again.

Maybe there’s some other way I can offer the mentoring so many people seem to crave and need.

Right now, though… sorry.

Still, this insight to the mind-set of entrepreneurs and biz owners who know they need serious help with writing… and yet cannot get past the obstacles blocking and freezing them up…

… should start some gears spinning in people’s heads.

For all the info out there… for all the courses, and the books, and the webinars… there remains NO technology as effective at breakthroughs in learning…

… as personal mentoring.

It’s how I got good. And it’s how most of the wizards now dominating the online/offline scene got good, too.

We’ll have to explore this more…

Meanwhile…

Here are the winners of the little contest:

1. Margaret Gedde, for so eloquently describing the terror of selling that can gum up your brain (no matter how much you realize it’s something you “should” be doing). Nice work, Margaret.

2. Jay Cross, on being frozen by a fear of failing. This certainly held me back for a very long time, and it’s not something to be taken lightly. Thanks for sharing a quasi-traumatic obstacle that more people share than dare admit, Jay.

3. Reed, on the disconnect biz owners feel between the “uncommon wisdom” of good advertising skills, and the more common “false wisdom” of the way most biz operate (and eventually die, starved for results).

4. Bill, for recognizing the prevalent opinion (common among entrepreneurs who hated school) (for good reasons) that all writing is inherently hellish and to be avoided at any cost. I’m surprised this one didn’t come up more often, actually… though it was one of the more repeated answers.

5. And finally, our old buddy Yoav… who best explained the minority position of yearning for actioniable information, rather than the theory-heavy stuff currently dominating the virtual bookshelves out there.

Great answers, guys (and gal).

Again — I am thrilled that so many people took the time to think this through, and send in a response.

No one “lost”. This laser-focused input isn’t science… but it’s still the best research you can gain access to, when your responding audience is as savvy as readers of this blog are.

So thanks. Again.

Hope you were able to take something good away from this exercise. It’s an example of how a little effort can yield amazing results.

Stay frosty,

John Carlton

Hey, I Need Your Help Here…

Thursday, 8:25pm
Reno, NV
“What’s keeping YOU up at night?”

Howdy,

Quick post here, I swear.

I have a small problem…

… and I could sure use your help.

It’ll take you, like, two minutes or so.

And yet… it will be of tremendous value to me. If I’ve ever given you something of value before — a piece of advice, a tip, a hint on direction, a good belly laugh, whatever — then I’m calling in the chit.

I want you to comment here.

Here’s what’s up: Among smart marketers — those who have their money-making act together — my core message is a well-known commodity.

“Nothing good will ever happen in your biz… until the copy gets written. And… the best person to write the most important stuff… is you.”

This message is unquestioned among the top marketers I hang out with.

They even eagerly tell anyone who will listen, to listen to me.

Many of the best (like Eben Pagan, Frank Kern, Rich Schefren and others) almost never talk about copy without mentioning my impact on their own learning curves… and they help spread the message.

The heavy hitters all know — without a shred of doubt — that copywriting is the foundation of all things profitable in business.

But here’s the rub: Outside that group of “in-the-know” marketers…

… I often run into a brick wall trying to get entrepreneurs and biz owners to truly understand the importance of writing.

I feel like the first guy to see the aliens land in a sci-fi movie… and the townspeople all ignore my dire warnings of Armegeddon. They smile and nod, and agree that it certainly WOULD be nasty-bad if evil aliens were coming, but…

And their minds wander off in total distraction.

If you’re in business…

… and you’re ignoring the role of great copy in your quest for success and wealth (and your need to learn HOW to write that great copy)…

… then, like the oblivious townsfolk, you’re risking becoming TOAST.

Especially in the economic melt-down happening now.

It’s really pretty simple: Those who know how to write killer ads, emails, video scripts and everything else…

… are going to thrive.

And those who don’t…

… well, it ain’t pretty.

And that’s my dilemna: I’m very good at reaching the “insiders” in business. They immediately “get” how critical and how totally cool it is to know how to write sales copy.

As for the people who are “un-initiated” in direct response?

Not so much.

The message seems to take a while to sink in.

So here’s what I would love to hear from you: What is your NUMBER ONE problem with writing ads right now?

Are you frustrated with the process of trying to write? Do you see it as hard work or — worse — as a big voodoo mystery you’ll never figure out?

Do you avoid learning the essentials of writing for any conscious reason? Or is there something personally difficult about writing that makes you just want to skip the whole concept?

Or what?

I am seriously looking for input here.

If you’re an entrepreneur… or small biz owner… or even a rookie… and you don’t know how to write what you need written…

… could you please look inside your own brain…

… and honestly share with me what the problem is? What is your Number One constraint holding you back from digging into this skill?

I’d appreciate it.

Thanks, in advance.

Hey — let’s make it a little contest.

The person who most succinctly and clearly helps me see what I’m missing here…

… will win a free copy of the freshly updated “Kick-Ass Copywriting Secrets of a Marketing Rebel” — the course that launched so many of the online marketers now dominating the virtual landscape.

Does that make it worth your time to look inside… and give me some insight as to why it’s so hard to break through the resistance so many people have on this mega-important subject?

C’mon. It’ll take you a couple of minutes. You may even learn something about yourself.

And…

… if you’re already writing your own stuff, successfully… you can get in the competition, too.

Just remember back to what held you up from getting started learning the skill.

What was your biggest obstacle? The cost of getting help? Not knowing where to turn or who to trust? Not having the time? What?

Let’s give it until Monday to decide on the winner, what do you say?

The competition begins now…

Stay frosty,

John Carlton

Buzz Killers

Monday, 7:54pm
Reno, NV
“Dude, you’re harshing my mellow…”

Howdy,

Let me know what you think about this, will ya?

It seems, at first, to be a light-weight subject…

… yet, really, it’s one of the foundations of living a good life.

I’m talking about the people you surround yourself with.

But not the way you’re thinking.

This may even jar you a little bit. Here goes:

Early in my career, I realized that grown-up life isn’t all that much different…

… than what goes on during recess in the third grade.

There are outsiders, insiders, cliques, teams, gangs, winners and losers galore.

No matter WHAT grisly experience you had in grade school…

… you’ve got company.

It’s brutal out there.

And then you become an adult…

… and it’s the SAME SHIT all over again. Hierarchies, power-grabbing, humiliation plays, one-up-manship, and clubs you can’t belong to.

The ranks of entrepreneurs I know are filled with “recess survivors” who finally gave the finger to “The System”, and went off on their own.

As amazing as it seems, you really can get on with life without the “gotcha” games and pettiness of “Life With Bullies, Prom Queens, and BMOC’s”.

However…

… that’s not the realization I want to share with you today.

Nope.

Instead, the second part of that epiphany (that life is just a replay of third grade recess) is this:

Regardless of whether you “won” or “lost” in the social-climbing bullshit you’ve suffered through in your time…

… it can all still be a blast

… if you have the right people around you.

In other words… it’s not whether you win, or lose.

It’s how much fun and insight to life you get during the adventure.

Let’s use me as an example.

Cuz I don’t mind telling embarrassing stories about myself:

I had a very mixed record of social “success” coming up the ranks… both in school, and in early adult life.

I was okay at sports. Just good enough to make the team and suffer the anxieties and physical/emotional debt of vicious organized games. And just under-powered enough to get cut from every attempt to make varsity. So I got to play… and I got to experience the arrid loneliness of the bench and the exit door.

But I sucked, utterly and without redemption, at most social interaction. Girls scared the bejesus out of me as a kid… flummoxed me as a teen… and toyed with me after that.

I was so unprepared, so confused, and so clueless about dealing with standard issues of dating and being a cool guy and feeling like I belonged… that, if I were a character in a novel, you’d roll your eyes and say “No way could anybody be that much of a loser!”

Yeah.

That was me.

But get this:

I still had a BLAST.

Even when Life dialed up the most humiliating, emotionally-scarring horror possible to a shy, skittish introvert like me…

… I was able to shake it off, and show up the very next day smiling and ready for more.

“That all you got, Fate? That’s your best shot, you miserable s.o.b.? Ha!”

You know how I did it? How I survived, and even thrived while being buried in sticks and stones and the arrows of misfortune?

I’ll tell you:

I had buddies to share it all with.

Not just fellow losers, either.

No.

And this is the essential point here: I had a close-knit group of guys (and a few gals) around me…

… who delighted in being alive.

There’s probably some social-math equation I could come up: Your ability to survive and thrive… is directly proportional to the time that elapses between a horrible event…

… and your ability to laugh about it.

With my friends and me, that time was often instantaneous.

We had a lot of practice.

(And I’m not talking about just dating disasters, or heartbreak, or social blunders. I’m including death, financial misery, and the near-total upheaval of normality. The kind of blows that can rock you to your knees.)

Wait.

I’m still not yet revealing the essence here.

The take-away of this tale is not “friends are good.”

Because I will attest that there was a very definable, and very rare aspect of these friends that is absolutely essential…

… and even beside the point of being able to laugh about tragedy.

You wanna guess what that aspect is?

It’s…

… energy.

This realization came rushing back to me yesterday while I chatted with my best friend from high school. Haven’t seen the dude in two years, but we stay in close touch.

And, mid-way through the call…

… I realized I ached from laughing.

Even though some of the subjects we discussed were illnesses in our families, job woes, relocation horror stories, and other tragedies.

And I was able to put a “quality” on that laughter.

It was bristling with raw energy. The “good” kind of energy.

There really are two kinds of people in the world: Those who bring energy with them to everything they do…

… and the great masses, who suck energy from you like psychic vampires. (That’s a Halbert term, by the way. Privately, we had other names for these types of buzz-killing grim reapers.)

I’ve known a lot of folks in my time. And I’ve unconsciously been putting each and every one through a little test upon meeting them.

The test is simple: Do they provide energy? Or are they leeching it from the air around us?

A party crammed with energy-gobbling vampires is a drag, through and through. Even Vegas can’t salvage a good time.

And yet, just hanging out with a single “mini-solar system” type of person in a drab coffee shop… can be pure bliss.

In business… in life… in games and in every social and quasi-social gathering…

… there is no fun, and little chance for adventure or good stories when the energy level is flat-lined.

And yet… when you are in the company of someone bursting with life-force…

… well, it’s pretty freaking magical.

The most mundane tasks become a joy. (My pal Art and I used to just drive around Cucamonga, with no goal or destination… not cruising, but rather just hanging out, laughing, basking in raw energy and verve and marvelling at the cruel and wonderful adventures Life handed out.)

Life isn’t gonna treat you better when you surround yourself with heat-source types. You’re still gonna take it on the chin, still gonna encounter monsters around every corner.

My mother — after ten months of gruesome chemo — still managed to tell a joke and make me smile… just hours before she passed away.

Believe me — there was nothing funny going on that afternoon.

But I cherish that last “don’t let the bastards get you down” shared moment with her.

If you understand what I’m talking about, you don’t need to know anything else about her to know exactly what kind of special woman she was.

That was over 15 years ago. And the lesson I learned is never far from my thoughts… especially when I’m feeling like Life has it out for me again.

Screw it.

The ride’s too short.

If you’ve got that flame in your soul, don’t let anyone or anything douse it.

We need you in the mix.

We already got enough of the damned vampires hovering…

Anyway, something to consider.

What do you think?

Stay frosty,

John Carlton

Tip For The Week

Thursday, 8:40pm
Rancho Cucamonga, CA
Just a block off Route 66 in the skitchy heart of the southland…

Howdy,

Quick note here today.

I’m still in my hometown (yeah, I grew up in Cucamonga, what’s it to ya?), visiting my family. Pop still lives in the same house he bought just after WWII, and it’s hard for me not to feel like I’m 15 again when I’m there.

Not that I feel all young and vibrant.

Naw. More like I get back in touch with how freakin’ clueless I was for the first half of my life.

It was a great childhood, a gruesome adolescence, and even now ghosts from my past haunt every corner of the neighborhood. It’s Memory Alley.

Always interesting/spooky/insightful to go back to old stomping grounds. I love my family. And I’m still chewing over how that town shaped who I am today…

Anyway, enough about me.

Here’s something about YOU: Since the last couple of posts here, I’ve been pondering long and hard about what “makes” an entrepreneur.

A lot of people — including me — talk about the value of goals in launching any entrepreneurial venture.

Figuring out what you truly want… setting a plan in motion to attain it… and following through.

There is, however, a difference in “understanding” goal-setting behavior…

… and actually DOING it.

And here is what I propose you do this weekend: Give yourself a nice, brutal Reality Check.

Are you spending enough time figuring out what you really want to do when you grow up?

This is not a trick question — most rookie goal-setters need to refine their skills at this over a frustrating period of time.

The first goals you set are likely to be things you actually don’t want, after all. There is an art to looking deep into your own heart and soul, and coming to grips with what REALLY rocks your boat…

… and what will continue to make nice waves in your future.

It’s never enough to want to be “rich”. You must spend time thinking about what “rich” means to you. Not to your buddies, or your colleagues, or anyone else.

You.

And, if you decide you want to be filthy rich… well, you’ve got to do more than just set a goal. You gotta work out your plan to get there.

With lots of little goals along the path.

If you’ve yet to make Dime One online, for example, then a goal of becoming a billionaire online isn’t a goal… it’s a dream. You’ve got to earn your first buck. Then your second. Then start automatic pipelines, and go on from there.

Your first goal may be to weed through all the info available out there… find the resources you feel you can trust… and dig in.

Those subsequent “dig in” steps — the actual goal-by-goal step-ladder that will take you toward your desired destination — cannot be glossed over.

And, there are consequences to consider. You may not yet know what awaits you as a cash-generating genius. But you sure can start to examine how your life changes as you go.

I’ve written multiple blogs about how every detail of your life can morph in strange ways when the money starts coming in. Ken Calhoun, in the last comments section, tells a great story of how friends and family wrestle (often unsuccessfully) with your rise in status, liquidity, and self-confidence.

It’s not always pretty.

The more you “arm” yourself with insight like this, the less surprised you’ll be when you hit each milestone in your quest for a better life.

You’ll be… uh, what’s the word… prepared.

Goals are great. They saved my life.

But I’ve known too many people who ONLY set goals. They never go after them.

Movement is key.

And you’ll feel better about moving toward your goals, if you spend some serious time thinking about them.

Play with them. Mold them. Constantly put them through your “What if?” grinder. (What if you can’t do it with your first idea? Will you try again? Try something else? What?)

The “secret ingredient” of great goal setting… is to cogitate obsessively on the consequences of actually meeting your goals, once you set them. This not only helps you blow through failure… but also creates a “vision” of yourself that keeps your motivation hot.

This requires “forward thinking”… which doesn’t come with the default equipment you’re born with.

You gotta exercise it.

Without goals, you’re just being taken for a ride by Fate.

Goals do not guarantee anything… except, once you take steps to attain them, you will move SOMEWHERE new in life.

And you’ll be doing as much of the driving as possible.

Fate will still screw with you. But you’re no longer helpless.

At first, even five minutes of focused “forward thinking” will make you sweat and want to go do something else.

Get over it. Stick with it.

Soon, you’ll be an ace at peering into the fog down the line, and you’ll be able to exert more control over events than you ever dreamed possible in your pre-goal-setting days.

This weekend, get your five minutes in. Move through the sweat and avoidance.

Jump-start something new.

Let me know how you do.

Stay frosty,

John Carlton

P.S. I just checked with my office… and as I get ready to go to the airport to come home, one of the 5 seats is still open for the Chicago Hot Seat one-day event this September 25.

To get the details, go to www.carlton-workshop.com.

C’mon, people — this is one of those rare opportunities to get face-time with me and Stan. It just may be the virtual ass-kicking you need to get moving…

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