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Kevin,
Masterful story telling.
You took me to that bar … I throughly enjoyed myself … and had a great night out. Thanks.
Man, I’m THIRSTY. Excellent post, Kev. Experiences any of us professional marketers, bar patrons, and drunks can relate to. Will you be here all week?
Lo
Reply I will, and don’t forget about happy hour from open to close Monday… 2-4-1 well drinks and free brats while they last.
Like we always say: it’s not a party till the redhead shows up.
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Shows up?
Man, she never leaves. Permanent mold of her butt in the third stool from the end…
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So… How’s the veal?
Seriously… That was a superb analogy and worthy of study. Thanks for the insight.
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outstanding!
Great perspective, and quite true.
Keep up the insider’s peek at humanity.
Thank you.
OK… will do, Mark.
Thanks, Jim. Glad you enjoyed it.
‘Nuther round for you fellas?
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I grew up in Mt.Prospect,Illimois. Small world. Next time you’re in town stop by my place – Captain Wannabees Copywriting School and Italian Beef.
It’s located in the old Sammy Skobel’s hot dog emporium.
Awesome, Tommy. I’ll take a beef with hot, dip it… and a side of punchy bullets.
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Great post and totally creative metaphorical lesson, Kev…
Makes me think that if the bartender is the smart marketer…
And the bar patrons are your customers….
Then the smokin’ band that packs the joint every Saturday night are your super-affiliates…
It only makes sense to be sure you’re also giving them everything you can so they’ll deliver their best… and that ain’t just a discount on the bar tab.
A clever bartender always make sure the singer has his pitcher of ice water and the lead guitar player gets his cold Becks and a shot of Jack in hand as they make their way to the stage for the second set…
Because when the band is happy… and they’re rockin’ the crowd, whipping them into a frenzy… the booze starts flowing fast and furious… and the tips come rolling in…
Everyone wins… especially the folks who go home exhausted from having TOO much fun and tell everyone in earshot about what a great time they had there over the weekend…
Fun post, mang. You da man.
Best,
Brian
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Ha. How could I forget the band, Bri?
I’m livin’ for the day we get the CW Band together on a stage.
You’re the singer. Carlton on lead. Raybould on rhythm. Landstrom on bass. And I play a mean tambourine.
I had us a drummer, but he just spontaneously combusted.
Reply I’ve already got the name, dude…
The Forced Continuities…
; )
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Okay I’m in…
… but only in if we play “Rockin In The Free (Plus Shipping) World”
Reply 
You are a really good storyteller.
But let me see if I got this right. You’ve reminded me of something Eben Pagan said again and again
… and that thing is “people don’t want to bond with companies, they want to bond with another individual (just like them)”.
They want someone who cares … who will show personal interest in them before and after buying the product … but most important, someone who can relate to.
Also, this is the difference between A list copywriters and damn good B list copywriters.
The last ones sell a product.
The first ones solve a problem.
Got that right?
Regards,
Razvan
Right as the mail, Razvan.
Sharing personal stories is the oldest bonding device in history.
Cavemen told tall tales in grunts and crude drawings… the Apostles spread the gospel on camelback… and out there somewhere Eben Pagan is grunting crude stories to a camel.
I’m sorry, what was the question?
Reply There was no question, only insight … learning from the best.
Thank you for your reply and I hope that you’ll post more often from now on.
Regards,
Razvan
PS: Your blog is a little faulty. In other words, it doesn’t load, and when it does, on the index page, I get an error 🙂
Try fixing that, it would be a capital sin not to let people read your blog (the copywriter’s edge).
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Good question, Mike. I think that is true with any buyer who puts your stuff to use.
So long you under-promise and over-deliver, you’ll always have loyal customers.
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Except that from F2F selling, the ratio is more like 5 table sitters to 1 bar, right on. If you focus on just the ready to buy, you will lose the others. Taking the time to educate the potential customer pays off in two ways.
One, they tell all their friends about how helpful you were, when they do buy. This is the most effective, cheapest way to advertise.
Second, it makes them more willing to be a lifetime buyer. As any person learns more about what you sell, if you sell high quality product, they want more from you. Rarely can anyone buy the best product you sell, right away. They usually can buy the low end products, and will “buy their way up,” as they can. But, only if you spend the time to make them knowledgeable, and able to recognize high end quality, at high end prices,
Eh. I don’t know, Walter. You may be setting your sights low with the assumption that people won’t buy your primo package out of the gate.
Test it. You may be surprised to find how many were waiting for “the good stuff” all along.
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Very valuable and enough all the same instructive example for merchants
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Great post Kevin,
Wow, I must be gettin’ old or lost my groove or something. I used to be the cash waving, elbow throwing patron jocking for a cold one and dancing the night away of long ago, but what the hell happened? I go to a bar once in a long while and I just want to have a quiet conversation and drink a glass of ice water. The waitress finally figures out I’m not a big buyer and essentially ignores me. Don’t you think the waitress or the bartender should spark my interest with something special?
Ken
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Ken, it’s all about the tip. Down at my local hole here in Albany, they all know I drink lemonade, and they know exactly how to make it how I like it.
The secret: tipping.
Sometimes, I forget my wallet (for real, think absent-minded professor). When I do have cash, I spew tips *very* liberally. When I don’t, well, the ladies take care of me.
I want customers like me: Where I know what they want, how to get it to them, and they just throw money at me.
Reply Well put, Dave. They don’t care what you drink, so long as you don’t vampire their time. Servers there to hustle a buck, not just create atmosphere.
Ken, you sound like the quintessential tire kicker. “I’m here, now impress me.”
And you’re right, the smart and dedicated marketer will welcome the challenge.
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“Crown. Rocks.” As I set down my Black Card, settle into my creaky observation post, nod to include the tab of exhausted off duty cops (Or copywriters, I can’t tell which) at the end of the bar and a look to convey a 25% tip for a series of long pours.
Kevin, from my post in your bar, I can barely distinguish Billy’s comments. I can, however, recognize myself in the various roles. The driven decisive buyer, the uncertain cautious questioner, the Socratic waitress and the execution machine behind the bar. I play all roles at various times and Kevin, you’ve reminded me how I feel in each role and how I want to be approached in each. Thank you.
Your compelling picture has helped me out of a problems I’ve been having for 2 weeks. Putting me back in the figurative bar stool “observation post” helped me recognize the missing piece. Nicely done. Thanks again,
Randy
Thanks, Randy. I’m glad it served as a spark for you.
You make a great point about sitting in the various positions of your business. The best CEO’s are the ones who spend a day at each position, from janitor to manager. There’s no better way to understand your company — and the needs of your customer.
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John,
This a very relatable post for me. Being a bartender for many years off and on this lesson of who is ready to buy and those that need a little coddling rings true.
I have worked mostly in higher end restaurants and some club bars. It is very easy to sell to the person who already has the mind set to fulfill their desire once they walk in the door. But, on the other side the other customer that sits at table is looking for a smile some wit and direction to their needs is a great parable to the act of selling.
The bartender has a hot market they only have to supply their wants and some dialogue they hang on to make their future business profitable.
The service person that caters to the tables has to become an icon of service. Their job is to understand how they can make their customers desires special and focused of being acknowledged and taken care. Their realization is that that they will just not be throwing money at you – they want service, answers and suggestions to better satisfy their wants and needs.
Enjoy a drink and stay service oriented. Your customer has needs you are answering.
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Great post Kevin, very entertaining.
I can relate – spent my formative adult years slinging suds… definitely a great way to grab insights and clues into what makes certain kinds of people tick. Useful knowledge for a copywriter.
And the after-hours parties didn’t exactly hurt my feelings either.
-David Raybould
Reply I know what you mean, David.
People say tending bar will push you onto one side of the drinking fence or the other. But, somehow I kept leaping back and forth.
Reply Dave,
Thanks for your insight. If I put two and two together, “tipping” the waitress should bring me a smile and perhaps an irisistable offer to buy a drink like an alcohol free margarita or in marketing terms an offer that’s like a glass of ice water but something better? Ah yes, Kevin, you blew my cover. I’m still kicking a lot of tires. I guess I’m trying to decide which ones will get me the most mileage and are puncture free.
Ken
Great example of how to tell a story. I was there. “Let them find their best selves through you.”
Wow. If we would really get this, and do this, people would stand in line to give us their money.
Great insight.
Thanks,
David
And you are…?
(apparently The Faceless Comic?)
Heh…
Vinegar and water comin’ up, Kev…
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Great analogy, Kevin – and a fun read, too – thanks.. I’m typing this here on my laptop at the MGM Grand in Vegas, here for awhile; I’ll try that ‘take the cash out’ tip at the local hotel bars and let ya know how that goes, great idea. I like club Tao at the Venetian, and Pure and ghostbar and … hmm lots of fun here to be had.
Great marketing lesson too, about two different types of prospects; key I’ve always got to remember is, like John says about somnabulent sloth-type default customers on the couch/table, we’ve got to get them taking action and waving cash, with engaging copy and credibility from the get-go, which in a cautious economy is a real bear. Low cost lead gen products at bottom end of product ladder (and payment plans, a hassle to admin) seem to be a good way to get folks sidling up to the bar and waving a (small) bill to get it all started. Me, I like having showgirls at my seminars, like yesterday here — it’s a great way to have fun.
Thanks for a good read, nice way to start the day.
from Vegas,
-ken
Hey Ken,
Thanks, man. I’m glad you enjoyed it. Always fun sitting in for the #1 Dude.
Showgirls, eh? There will be a video release I hope.
Kevin
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Hey, thanks for chiming in, Turgid.
Yes, we’re alive and well. I’ve taken a vacation, and a turkey break, like all good folks should do regularly.
I’ll be posting again soon. There is no schedule here. Get on the mailing list, and you’ll be notified when new posts go up.
And instead of bitching about not seeing a new post in a 2 week period, why don’t you get off your butt and check out the FIVE FREAKING YEARS worth of archives here.
Jesus. This new generation — their constant need for rapidly changing stimulation is insane. Here’s a suggestion: Stop skimming over the good stuff… and even take the time to read it over and over, several times. You do NOT retain info or ideas when you blow through life at top speed. You just become a grazing animal, with shallow knowledge and un-honed skills.
That advice, btw, is worth a fortune if you take it. Slow down, learn how to absorb and retain, and implement.
Keys to the kingdom.
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I have been spanked.
I’m starting on the December 2004 archive right now.
Thanks John
Reply Thanks for the note. And know that I have been slapped around (metaphorically) by mentors and teachers my entire career. You have the right attitude — it’s all about the learning. Remember how pissed the student was in The Karate Kid. I was just like him, frustrated and impatient. It’s good to keep the larger goal in mind: Discover new stuff, and keep moving toward your goals. If there’s a little moment of readjustment forced on you here and there, so be it.
Good luck.
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It’s official: John Carlton has turned into a crabby old lady in his old age.
John, please take another vacation. Watch a few old episodes of Golden Girls if you have to. (My mom used to love that show.) Maybe that will help loosen you up.
Reply You must be a newcomer to the blog, Eric. I’m been a curmudgeon — when it’s been appropriate — since I was a brash young man freshly encountering the hypocrisy and idiocy of the world.
And you haven’t got a clue what “looseness” is if you believe watching TV can somehow facilitate it.
Okay, enough of this boring sub-thread. Let’s all get busy preparing for 2010…
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@John in reply to turgid
Point well taken, John. That’s one of the reasons why I’m personally not crazy about blogs (even though I write several). Blogs are just a crappy way to organize information and articles. Reverse order by date? Huh?
They make it too hard to find what you’re looking for — even Part 1 of the piece you’re reading.
So I question how long the current format of blogs will last. Maybe someone will create a WordPress plugin or theme that’s organized around pages (articles) rather than the date of each post. (Or are there some I’m not aware of? Anybody?)
Oh yeah, almost forgot. Awesome post, Kevin. Great job!
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Jesus loves me.
I come in late to this bar and all I get is “parrot shit” to clean up?
Cut me some slack here. I’m trying to learn.
🙂
Mad Guy
[…] parallel to our direct selling market and how bar customers can teach us a lot about marketing. Give it a read. Tags: Bartender, Blog, Copy Writing, John Carlton, Kevin Rogers, Lot, Marketing, Masters, Quot, […]
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