The Rest Of Your Freakin’ Life (Redux)

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Wednesday, 6:50pm
Reno, NV
Hey, you bastards, I’m still here!” (Steve McQueen as Papillon, floating away to freedom…)

Howdy…

I’m re-publishing — for what has become a very popular tradition on this blog — one of the more influential posts I’ve ever written.

It’s a good one, worth rereading even if you read it before.

What you’re about to encounter is a slightly tweaked way of looking at the best way to start your new year…

… but this tweak makes all the difference in the world. I’ve heard from many folks that this particular technique finally helped them get a perspective on where they’re at, where they’re going…

… and why they care about getting there.

So, even if you’ve read this post before… it’s worth another look. Especially now, as you gaze down the yawning gullet of 2013, trying to wrap your brain around a plan to make the year your bitch.

This is a critical step for entering any new period of your life. To keep your life moving ahead, you need to set some goals, dude. And most goal-setting tactics, I’ve found, are useless. Worst among them is the traditional New Year’s resolutions (which seldom last through January).

This tactic I’m sharing with you (again) is something I’ve used, very successfully, for decades…

… to reach goals, to clarify the direction of my life, and to change habits. I first shared it in the old Rant newsletter a few years back, and I’ve hauled it out here in the blog on a regular basis.  It’s timeless, classic stuff that will never let you down.

So let’s dive in. Here’s the relevant part of the post (slightly edited):

“Goal Setting 101 And
The January 15th Letter”

Yeah, yeah, I know a chat about goals can quickly turn into a boring, pedantic lecture. But then, so can a chat about space flight.

And, in reality, both space flight and your goals are VERY exciting things.

Or should be.

It’s all in the telling.

What I’m not going to discuss are “resolutions”. Those are bogus pseudo-goals that have the staying power of pudding in a microwave.

No. It’s merely a coincidence that I’m suggesting a review of your goals in January, just after the New Year’s supposed fresh start.

I mean… there’s not much else to do, so why not sit down and plan out the rest of your life.

This is, of course, a very damp, cold, and bleak time of year. The depths of winter and discontent.

A good percentage of the population suffers fleeting depression because of lack of sunlight… thanks to the geniuses behind Daylight Savings Time, who arrange for dusk to arrive around 2:30 in the afternoon in these parts.

We also just got slammed with back-to-back-to-back “Storms of the Century”, each one dumping a record load of snow on us. I sent photos to friends, and many emailed back wondering when I’d gone to Antarctica to live.

We had a little cabin fever brewing. Didn’t help when the local PBS channel ran a special on the Donner Party, either. Three feet of snow drifting down, the lights flickering, enough ice on the road to make the SUV sidle like a Red Wing goon slamming someone into the boards.

The safest place was home… but man, the walls start to close in after a few days.

I’m telling you, I had excuses up the yin-yang for allowing my senses to get a little dulled. The natural response is to turn your mind off, and hibernate until March. And I succumbed. Started moping around, watching CSI: Miami reruns instead of reading a book, surfing the Net for stuff I didn’t care about… you know the drill.

I’m sure you’ve done your own version of it now and again.

And I’m also sure you already know that no amount of “buck up” happy talk will mitigate the gloom.

In fact, there are a few enlightened health pro’s who say we should let our bodies wind down every year or so. Get a full system-flush type of cold, crawl under the covers for a few days and let the demons and other bad stuff bubble to the surface. So you can purge the crud. Evacuate the used-up bacteria and tube-clogs out of your pipes, physically. And shoo the whispering monsters out of your head.

We’re not perfect creatures. We need to sleep, we need to recharge our batteries, and we need to stop and get our bearings. At least once a year. So don’t beat yourself up for the occasional down period. We all have them, and the healthiest folks just roll with it. It’s not good to repress this stuff.

It only becomes a problem when you sink into clinical depression. That’s the cold, empty state where nothing looks good, and hope is an absurd memory.

I’ve been there. Several times. The year I turned 30 (for example) I lost my job, my girlfriend and my place to live all within a 45-day stretch.

That shit can wear you down.

Now, I have two things to say about this:

Thing Numero Uno: If you think you’re losing a grip on your mental state, seek professional help. Don’t head straight for pharmaceutical land, though — give “talk therapy” a try with a real, qualified psychotherapist.

Choose this therapist carefully. You’re going to dump every secret you have on him. You may need to plow through a couple to find one that clicks with you (just as you might have to try out several dentists or plumbers to get a good match). (And yes, you should regard this therapist just as you would your dentist — they’re not gonna become your new best friend, but they will bring a professional expertise to the table during the time you need them. And you only need to see them until you get your head straight… which might be a short time or long time. Again — just like you may need serious dental work, or just a cleaning once a year. Figure it out.)

Keep in mind the fact that everyone goes through bumpy emotional states. And that the percentage of people who actually do lose it every year is rather small.

That’s why talking about your problems with someone who has perspective can be so beneficial — the first thing you learn is that you aren’t alone. And what you’re going through is not abnormal.

Most of the time, you’re probably going to be fine. Even when your problems seem overwhelming. There are tools available to help your brain cope. You don’t often come across these tools on your own.

This kind of talk-therapy is one of the few times the “science” of psychology earns its keep — because finding out how others successfully dealt with the same nonsense you’re suffering through can change everything. Seriously — often, just discovering that you’re not alone in what you’re going through, that others have successfully navigated similar troubles, and that the folks who study human behavior and thinking patterns now have really simple (and super-effective) ways to obliterate feeling overwhelmed can solve much of what’s currently holding you back.

A good book to read (while you’re waiting for the spring thaw) is “Learned Optimism” by Martin Seligman. I’ve recommended it before, and it deserves another nod. (The blurb on the back cover, from the New York Times Book Review, starts with “Vaulted me out of my funk…”)

I haven’t read the book in a few years, but I remember the main lesson well. A study, explained up front, stands out: Someone tested the “happiness” quotient of a vast sample of people, including Holocaust survivors.

And it turns out that, at some point in your life, Abraham Lincoln was right — you are as happy as you decide to be.

This is startling news to anyone lost in despair. Because it seems like you’ve been forced to feel that way. With no choice.

But it’s not the case. The happiness study revealed that you can not tell from a person’s current attitude what sort of trauma they had gone through earlier in life. People who had suffered horribly could be happy as larks, while silver-spoon never-stubbed-a-toe folks were miserable.

The difference? Attitude. Optimistic people work through setbacks and trauma… while pessimists settle into a funk that can’t be budged.

And it’s a CHOICE. At some point in your life, you choose to either live in gloom or sunlight.

This realization rocks many folk’s boat. Especially the pessimists. They dominate society, politics, business, everything. And they are very protective of their gloom and doom outlook. Invested, heavily, in proving themselves right about the inherent nastiness of life.

Maybe you’re one of ‘em.

If you are, you’re killing yourself, dude.

The guys in lab coats who study this stuff say that heart disease rates are HALF for optimists over pessimists. So, even if you doubt the ability to measure “happiness” — and it is a rather rocky science — you still can’t deny the stats on dropping dead from a gloomy ticker.

Now, I am most assuredly NOT a clear-eyed optimist. I get creepy feelings around people who are too happy all the time.

But I do prefer having a good time, and appreciating the finer things in life (like a deep breath of cold alpine air, or the salty whip of an ocean wave around my ankles, or a secret smile from the wonderful woman I live with).

I’m just good at balancing out the bad with the good.

Being in direct response helps. Lord knows, there’s a LOT of bad with every piece of good news in this wacky biz.

Gary Halbert and I had a term we used for years: We’re “pessimistic optimists”. (Or maybe we’re optimistic pessimists. I forget.)

How does that work? Easy.

We expected horrible atrocities at every turn… and rejoiced when we defied Fate and unreasonable success rained down on our undeserving heads. We grooved on the good stuff in life… and just nodded sagely at the bad stuff and moved past it as quickly as possible. Maybe cop a lesson or two as we scurried by.

If you focus on the bad things that can go wrong, you’ll never crawl out of bed in the morning.

When you finally realize that — not counting health problems — pretty much everything bad that business, or relationships, or politics can throw at you will not kill you… then you can begin to relax.

And eagerly court the Unknown by starting another project.

Have you ever had your heart broken? Hurts like hell, doesn’t it. Feels like your life is over.

Well, from my perspective, sitting here at “way past 50” and pretty darned happy, all those romances-gone-wrong that broke my heart long ago look just plain silly now. And my resulting deep depressions — where I was sure my life was over — are just tiresome lessons I had to get through.

Not a one of those ladies was worth a burp of angst. They were fine people, I’ll agree to that. A few were exceptional (and very skilled at certain man-pleasing arts).

But worth a Shakespearean suicide?

No way.

It’s taken me a while, but I’m now a certified realist. My youthful idealism has drained away, and my brushes with hate-everything dogma never took.

And guess what? Contrary to what an embarrassingly huge number of self-righteous folks would have you believe… being a realist has not dented my passion for life one little bit. In fact, it has opened up a whole new world of unexplainable spirituality (which cannot be contained within any formal religion).

I’m not against religion. Let’s have no “save my soul” emails here. One of my favorite friends to argue with has a doctorate in theology. And I have many other friends committed to various belief systems ranging from fundamentalist to Buddhist to humanist. We get along because, on a deep level, we understand that true spirituality transcends whatever way you choose to express it or appreciate it.

I loathe black-and-white views of the world. It’s a shame that our great country has descended to this “you’re nuts if you don’t agree with me” mentality… but it’s part of the pendulum that’s been swinging back and forth ever since we left the jungle.

The far edges of our institutions — political, religious, cultural, all of it — are in spiritual and emotional “lock down”. They’re sure they’re right, they’re positive you’re wrong, and neither facts nor logic will sway their position.

Mushy liberals seem astonished that anyone would ever not love us, or want to destroy our culture. Repressed conservatives seem intent on crushing everyone who pisses them off (and that’s a lot of people).

It’s “whatever” versus “blind obedience”. And neither works so hot in the real world. I have no use for dogma, or idealism, or punishingly-harsh rules that have been cooked up by hypocrites.

Hey — I’m in no position to tell anyone how to live their life. I’ve screwed up plenty, and if I have any wisdom at all, it’s only because I’ve survived some truly hairy situations.

But I don’t believe anyone else is in a position to tell you how to live, either. That’s gotta be your decision.

And it’s a damn hard one to make.

Fortunately, while I can’t tell you how to live, I can move some smooth (and proven) advice in your direction. Take it or leave it… but give it a listen anyway, cuz my track record on successful advice-giving is fairly impressive.

And I’m telling you that having a hateful, brooding attitude will stunt your growth. It will make you a smaller person, a less-wise person, an older and feebler person. And you won’t grow. Not spiritually, not physically, not emotionally. Not in your business life, either.

Most people don’t want to grow, anyway. Growth only comes from movement and change… and the vast majority of the folks walking the earth with us today are terrified of change.

You can’t blame them, really. Change is a form of death. Whatever was before, dies. And whatever comes next must be nurtured with devotion and sacrifice.

That’s hard. That’s a hard way to live, always dying and being reborn.

And because it’s hard, it’s avoided.

Well, screw that.

I suspect, if you’re reading this, you are not afraid of change. But you may not yet understand the power that REALLY giving yourself to change offers.

And that brings us to…

Thing Numero Dos: Goals are all about change.

That’s a subtle point many people gloss over. Rookie goal-setters often get stuck on stuff like quitting smoking, or vague concepts like “become a better person”.

Or “get rich”.

That seldom works. Goals need to be specific… and they need to involve profound change in order to take hold.

Halbert often talked about “image suicide” — the necessity of killing and burying the “self” you are so heavily invested in, before you can move to a new level of success.

I see this all the time in my consultations. Biz owners refuse to do even slightly risky marketing, for fear of damaging their “reputations.”

And my question to them is: What reputation?

Unless you’re the top dog in your niche, no one gives a rat’s ass about what you think or do. No one is looking at your marketing for inspiration or condemnation, because you aren’t the guy to look at.

No. What these scaredy-cats are talking about when they say “reputation” is what their family and friends think of them. And that’s a sure sign of a losing attitude. That ain’t Operation MoneySuck.

My colleague Ron LeGrand, the real estate guru, is one of the best natural salesmen I’ve ever met. The guy understands the fundamental motivating psychology of a prospect at a master’s level.  And he knows that one of the major obstacles he faces in every sale… is what the prospect’s spouse (usually the wife) will say.

She can nix the sale with a sneer. Or she can nix it in the prospect’s head, as he imagines that sneer.

Ron counters both sides of the objection expertly. He encourages the prospect to get his spouse involved in the decision, so she becomes invested in it. Or, he suggests waiting until the first big check comes in… and letting the money explain to her about what you’re up to.

This is the reality of most people’s lives. As much as they want what you offer… they are terrified of making a mistake. Cuz they’ll pay dearly for it at home.

It’s a huge deal-killer.

That’s why you include lots of “reason why” copy in your pitch — to give your buyer ammunition for explaining his decision to the doubters in his life. However, as Ron knows, the best (and simplest) “reason why” is results.

Money, as they say, talks.

The top marketers seldom give a moment’s thought to what a risky tactic might do to their “reputation”. They don’t really care what people think about them. You can’t bank criticism.

I know many marketers who are involved in projects they are passionate about… but which bore their spouses to tears. Some (like Howard Stern’s former wife) are even deeply embarrassed. But they don’t complain too much. Because the money’s so good.

Aw, heck. I could go on and on about this. The story of Rodale’s shock and dismay at the brutally-honest ad I wrote for their timid “sex book” is a great example. They refused to mail it, because of their “reputation”. Yet, after it accidentally did mail, and became a wildly-successful control for 5 years, they suddenly decided their reputation could handle it after all.

The people who get the most done in life are all extreme risk-takers. They embrace change, because growth is impossible without it.

But you don’t go out and start changing things willy-nilly.

You need goals.

And you need a plan.

Now, there are lots of books out there that tell you how to set goals. I recently found, in a moldy banker’s box, the ad for Joe Karbo’s book “The Lazy Man’s Way To Riches” that I’d responded to back in 1982. The exact ad! With the order form torn out… it was the first direct mail pitch I’d ever encountered, and it changed my life forever. Joe’s book was essentially a treatise on setting goals. And it’s good.

It was a wake-up call for me. I’m having that crinkly old ad framed. Can’t imagine why I kept it, but I did. Pack-rat riches.

If you can’t find that particular book, there are dozens of newer goal-setting guides on the shelves. But they’re all based on the same formula:

1. Decide what you want.

2. Write it down, and be specific.

3. Read the list often, imaging as you read that you have already achieved each goal.

What this does is alter the underpinnings of your unconscious. When one of your goals is to earn a million bucks this year, and that goal burns bright in the back of your mind, each decision you make will be influenced.

So, for example, you won’t accept a permanent job somewhere that pays $50,000 a year. Cuz that isn’t going to help you attain your goal.

The problem is this:  To earn a mil in a year, you need to average around $50,000 every two weeks. This is why it can take a while to get your goal-setting chops honed. As I’ve said many times, most folks don’t know what they want.

And they aren’t prepared for the changes necessary to get what they want, once they do decide on a goal.

What kind of guy earns $50,000 every two weeks, like clockwork? It takes a certain level of business savvy to create that kind of steady wealth. It doesn’t fall into your lap.

What kind of guy makes a windfall of a million bucks in one chunk? That’s another kind of savvy altogether.

In that same moldy banker’s box, I also found a bunch of my early goal lists. And I’m shocked at how modest my aims were. At the time — I was in the first months of going out on my own, a totally pathetic and clueless rookie — I couldn’t even imagine earning fifty K a year. My first goal was $24,000 as a freelancer. And to score a better rental to live in. Find a date for New Year’s. Maybe buy a new used car.

Listen carefully: I met those goals. As modest as they were, it would have been hard not to. I needed them to be modest, because I was just getting my goal-setting chops together. And I wasn’t sure if I was wasting my time even bothering to set goals.

Let me assure you, it was NOT a waste of time.

The lists I found covered several later years, too. And what’s fascinating is that many of the more specific goals I set down were crossed out — I wanted those goals, but didn’t feel confident about obtaining them.

So I crossed them out, and forgot about them.

A couple of decades later, I realize that I’ve attained every single one of those “forgotten” goals. The big damn house, the love of my life, the professional success, even the hobbies and the guitars and the sports car.

I’m stunned. This is powerful voodoo here.

The universe works in mysterious ways, and you don’t have to belong to a religion to realize this. The whole concept of “ask and you shall receive, seek and you shall find, knock and the door will be opened” was well-known by successful people long before Luke and Matthew wrote it down.

The keys are action. Movement.

Ask, seek, knock.

These simple actions will change your life forever.

Back to making a million in a year: Some guys know what they need to do to make this goal real. They’ve done it before, or they’ve come close.

Setting the goal is serious business for them… because they are well aware of the tasks they’ve assigned themselves. Take on partners, put on seminars, create ad campaigns, build new products. Get moving on that familiar path.

I’ve known many people who started the year with such a goal… who quickly modified it downward as the reality of the task became a burden. Turns out they didn’t really want the whole million after all. Half of that would suffice just fine. To hell with the work required for the full bag of swag.

Other guys don’t know what they need to do to earn a mil. So their goal really is: Find out what I need to do to earn a million bucks.

Their initial tasks are to ask, seek, and knock like crazy. And change the way they move and act in the world. Because they must transform themselves into the kind of guy who earns a million bucks in one year.

Right now, they aren’t that guy.

So, for example, reading “The 7 Habits Of Highly Effective People” suddenly becomes an “A” task, while remodeling the kitchen gets moved to the back of the burner. Sharpening your ability to craft a killer sales pitch becomes more important than test-driving the new Porsche.

More important, even, than dating Little Miss Perfect. And test-driving her new accessories.

Tough choice?

Nope. When you get hip to the glory of focused change, you never lament leaving the “old” you behind.

It will be hard, sometimes, no doubt about it. Especially when you discover your old gang no longer understands you, or mocks your ambition. They liked the old, non-threatening you. They want him to come back.

But you’ve changed. And hot new adventures are going to take up a lot more of your time now.

My trick to setting goals is very simple:

Every January 15th, I sit down and write myself a letter, dated exactly one year ahead.

And I describe, in that letter, what my life is like a year hence. (So, in 2012, for example, I dated the letter to myself as January 15, 2013.)

It’s a subtle difference to the way other people set goals. Took me a long time to figure it out, too.

For many years, I wrote out goals like “I live in a house on the ocean”, and “I earn $24,000 a year”. And that worked. But it was like pushing my goals.

Writing this letter to myself is more like pulling my goals. For me, this works even better. Every decision I make throughout the year is unconsciously influenced, as I am pulled toward becoming the person I’ve described.

But here’s where I do it very differently: My goals are deliberately in the “whew” to “no friggin’ way” range. Mega-ambitious, to downright greedy.

There’s a sweet spot in there — doable, if I commit myself, but not so outrageous that I lose interest because the required change is too radical.

I’m pretty happy with myself these days. Took me a long, hard slog to get here, and I earned every step. And I want to continue changing, because I enjoy change. But I don’t need to reinvent myself entirely anymore.

So here’s what makes this ambitious goal-setting so effective: I don’t expect to REACH most of them.

In fact, I’m happy to get half of what I wanted.

There’s a ton of psychology at work there. The person I describe a year away often resembles James Bond more than the real me. Suave, debonair, flush, famous, well-traveled… and in peak health. I hit all the big ones.

However, long ago I realized that trying to be perfect was a sure way to sabotage any goal I set. Perfectionists rarely attain anything, because they get hung up on the first detail that doesn’t go right.

Being a good goal-setter is more like successful boxing — you learn to roll with the punches, cuz you’re gonna get hit.

You just stay focused on the Big Goal. And you get there however you can.

I’m looking at last year’s letter. I was a greedy bastard when I wrote it, and I didn’t come close to earning the income figure I set down.

Yet, I still had my best year ever.

And — here’s the kicker — I would NOT have had such a great year, if I wasn’t being pulled ahead by that letter. There were numerous small and grand decisions I made that would have gone another way without the influence of what I had set down.

I didn’t travel to the places I had listed. But I did travel to other, equally-fun places. I didn’t finish that third novel. But I did position it in my head, and found the voice I want for narration. That’s a biggie. That was a sticking point that would have kept the novel from ever getting finished.

Now, it’s on power-glide.

There’s another “hidden” benefit to doing this year-ahead letter: It forces you to look into the future.

A lot of people make their living peering ahead and telling everyone else what to expect. Most do a piss-poor job of it — weathermen are notorious for getting it wrong, as are stock market analysts, wannabe trend-setters, and political prognosticators.

Yet, they stay in business. Why? Because the rest of the population is terrified of looking into the future. That would require some sincere honesty about their current actions… since what the future holds is often the consequence of what you’re doing right now.

If you’re chain-smoking, chasing street hookers, and living on doughnuts, your future isn’t pretty. For example.

Or if you’ve maxed out all your credit cards, and haven’t done your due diligence to start bringing in moolah, your future isn’t nice, either.

No one can “see” into the future for real. But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try. In fact, it’s easy, when you have a little experience in life.

Things you do today will have consequences tomorrow. If you put up a website today for a product, and you do everything you can to bring traffic to it and capture orders… your consequence can be pretty and nice.

Sure, you may get hit by a bus while fetching the morning paper… but letting that possibility scare you off of trying for something better is for pessimists (who are scheduled for early checkout).

You have enormous control over your future.

And once you realize that, you can set out to start shaping it.

Stay frosty,

John

P.S. If you’re one of those people who’ve been skimming blogs like this… never reading anything carefully and slowly, and digesting what’s on the page… then I have one more suggestion for you: Stop doing that.

Most of the uber-successful folks I know (and I know a lot) have both skimming skills AND “deep reading” skills. And they know when to use them. You skim to get overviews, which may turn out to be flawed (because you missed something crucial in your skimming). You deep-read when you want to absorb something important, and you need to make the impression of what you read stick in your brain.

Right now, there are readers here who should be seriously considering the courses and opportunities I offer in the right-hand column of this blog. This is the stuff that has launched freelance careers, transformed biz owners into ad-writing monsters, and armed both rookie and veteran entrepreneurs with the fundamentally awesome skills of success. Quickly, and with the surety of proven-in-the-real-world tactics and advice.

So stop screwing around. If you need further help in getting your career going, or in crafting the kind of marketing that will boost profits through the roof… then consider the offerings on this page an essential task in your new list of goals. This is the real deal. No fluff, no nonsense — just honest, solid, proven stuff from a respected veteran of biz success.

Meanwhile, get busy with your January 15th letter.

P.P.S. One of your main goals, if you’re a serious entrepreneur and you haven’t mastered slamming out world-class copy yet for your bad self… is to GET bad-ass at it as soon as humanly possible. I don’t care how you do it — find a mentor, start experimenting with one of the many courses or coaching programs out there…

… or, as I recommend, just dive into The Simple Writing System, and be done with your learning curve in just a very short time.

Give yourself at least the OPTION of deciding yes-or-no, with some background, by going to this site and seeing what’s up. At the very least, read some of the testimonials, to get a taste of how powerful the transformation in your life and career can be when you finally get hip to writing salesmanship-infused copy like this.

Go here, right now, and see if this isn’t exactly what you need to move up a few steps, fast…

31 Responses to The Rest Of Your Freakin’ Life (Redux)

  1. Always refreshing to read this with new eyes from another year gone by.

    Thanks for the nudge to spend some time reading this again and getting the next letter planned for the 15th.

    Have a great year John… and continued thanks for the riches you share.

    Cheryl

  2. Hi John,

    I really appreciate the advice you put out on your blog, free for anyone. Thank you for that.

    Currently I am using my copy of “Kickass Copywriting Secrets” to create profitable advertising (and a responsive, profitable list) in the photography market… selling products as an affiliate.

    I’ll let you know how that worked out in a while.

    – Ben (from Belgium)

  3. Thanks for the good dose of Grizzled Pro Wisdom, John. I’ve read this post several times as I dove into the archives of the blog… but it’s strange how some time away from a good piece of writing will let you see some new insights that you didn’t previously.

    I’ve already spent a day crafting out some long-term directions and goals for the next few years, but I’m gonna be getting that January 15th letter up and running for sure.

    Now I hate to do this, but WHEN is Volume 2 of The Entrepreneur’s Guide To Getting Your Shit Together coming out??

    If it helps, I promise to by tons of copies to hand out to all my biz-savvy and streetsmart friends!

    Back to copying out Gary Halbert’s “An Open Letter To Every Man And Women In America Who Wants To Have Better Sex Without Feeling Guilty” longhand (following Halbert’s advice to copy out 500 great long-copy direct-response ads)… also, did you have a hand writing it?

    The bullets have some serious Carlton in them (I can see the one-two punches and the interspersed blind bullets!) and the tone is remniscent of your ads I’ve seen with OHP Direct, plus you’ve mentioned road-dogging under Halbert…

    Hope you’ll have a great New Year, and that it ain’t too cold in Reno,

    Sincerely,
    Chris

  4. I’m on my second read of this post and am taking snippets as notes this time. These posts have layers of wisdom which dig deep in to ones brain…

    …and give the occasional wake up call.

    I love the section about the people who choose to be happy — even the Holocaust survivors — I’ll invest in that book and the Joe Karbo one… me thinks. I need to!!

    This looks a great method of goal setting — I know I’ve got to “Kill off” a ton of my old self to ever make a success of anything…

    …however I’ve been a great contender at doing this in the past — and risk taking — just need to carry it to the next level.

    I sussed out some time ago that learning to write copy — even to a level where I can sell my own stuff — was the way to go.

    I’m a bit in no mans land at the mo as I’ve read a ton… seen a ton of critiques… but still cant seem to be able to write my own with confidence… and am a tad overwhelmed still.

    I have the enthusiasm still though and won’t be beaten on this one.

    Dad was a master salesman — he’s not here to teach me his craft, I do remember him selling though — a combination of charm and really good offers… and making his customers feel special. That was the key to his success I reckon.

    He started selling from the back of a van after quitting a good career in the Royal Navy as he wanted to spend more time with his family… that was in the 1960’s.

    Its strange in all my research of “how to get what you want” that I’ve stumbled across the same ideas… just in a digital environment.

    Selling is the key to everything — I’ve just got to master it in print. Bloody hard work!!

    Anyway…

    …I’m going to keep reading and note taking with this post and then get clear about what needs changing on this sales letter (for the VSL templates) which I’ve set myself as an assignment to complete.

    Get ready to set some goals and really DO the changes that are necessary.

    Thanks for the great advice John. I love your stuff as it motivates me to make the changes I need to.

    cheers Carl

  5. Thanks for the solid advice explained in a way that really hits home. Not to mention that it can be FUN to imagine and really describe your ideal life one year ahead in detail.

  6. Pow! Bang! Floored!
    A very good smack back to reality, Thanks John.
    Is there a blog post or article where I can read more about
    Rodale’s Ad that you mentioned here? Would be interested as you piqued my brain.
    GREAT re-posting of this blog.

    • Hi Orvel. Time for you to buy some of my shit. I am very generous in giving away good stuff — free blog here, free podcast at pi4mm.com, free advice over Facebook (/john.carlton)…

      … but most of my fans, students and followers go to the for-sale stuff for deeper teaching/advice. Get “Kick-Ass Copywriting Secrets of a Marketing Rebel”, the book “Entrepreneur’s Guide To Getting Your Shit Together”, and check out “The Simple Writing System”… all available with a few clicks over in the right-hand column here.

      As great as this article is, it pales to what else I’ve written in those sources. Go check ’em out…

    • Kevin Rogers and I are going to explore specific goal-writing tips in a new podcast for “Psych Insights For Modern Marketers” this week. I’ll alert folks through email on this. I may even share one of my actual letters.

      So make DAMN SURE you’re signed up for receiving email from me, using your best email address. Up top in the right-hand column here — just sign in, and you’re set. Plus, you get that kickin’ free report…

  7. Man, I just LOVE the way you write in a no holds barred, no bullshit kind of way!

    I truly enjoy reading every post, but this one really hit home for me. In fact, I stopped reading to try to find my copy of “7 Habits”, but couldn’t so had to order another.

    And, I’ve already started that letter to my future self because I truly need some kind of kick in the butt to get my copywriting career launched after using every conceivable excuse I could find up till now.

    Thanks again and please keep this great stuff coming!

  8. John,
    I just want to take you back to the Eighties for a minute. In Kick Ass Copywriting Secrets, on around page 23, you mention that you got your first gigs from the LA Times. Were you advertising your services there, or were you responding to ‘wanted’ ads by business owners looking for a copywriter???
    I’d love to hear more about how you got your first clients. Also, for your first gigs, how did you position yourself? Especially pricewise…

    Thanks, and have a great 2015

    Garrett

    • Hi Garrett. I did not advertise my services. I just read the Classifieds, under “writers”, “copywriters”, “advertising”, and “marketing”. I do not think these classified section are still operable, however. In the new online age, I’d use LinkedIn, Facebook and Adwords, and yes, I would definitely “push” my services by advertising them.

      The “Freelance Manual” has much more about this.

  9. Well, John. I’ve been reading this post for a couple of years. Finally got off my lazy, scared butt and wrote the damn letter. I got laid off early in 2014 and pretended I was in early retirement. Sure did like drinking a cup of coffee in the morning and thinking prosperous thoughts. Now I have to go back to work so I don’t have to eat pet food as an old woman.
    I’ve got an ebook outline and dictated it once. Technology has its flaws so I’ll need to re do. But the skeleton and action plan is there. Back to the real world is only a temporary set back.
    Thanks for the kick in the pants.
    Peace out.
    Theresa

    • You’re welcome, Theresa. Good luck — you’ve got the right attitude. Be sure to enjoy the process — we live in amazing times, and even if you’re not on top of the game yet, you can get there. And you can enjoy the ride.

  10. Whew! Thank God I avoided the pen-lashing in the P.S.! I DID deep-reading of EVERY word and didn’t skim. Pondered every sentence and even wrote my January 5, 2016 letter to myself! Thanks John for ALWAYS shaking us up with your words! Happy New Year!

    • Stunning how many folks (on social media) have complained about the length of this article. True, it ain’t short, but it isn’t a novel, either.

      I worry for folks who, through the immediacy and brevity of social media, have decided that EVERYTHING needs to be short. That’s just… dumb. The good ideas need airing out.

      I’m not everyone’s cup o’ tea, either. If you don’t like longer, involved stories, I’m not your guy. (Imagine “Christmas Story” reduced to a 30-sec YouTube video: Ralphie wants a Red Ryder rifle, gets it, breaks his glasses, and then Xmas is over. The end.” Not quite the same punch…)

  11. Hey John!

    Great article. A librarian told me something interesting last year that might interest your readers – “you need to think carefully about what you read in life.” I had to ask “why?” She noted that if you were a great reader that could pound down a book a week that would be 52 books a year. I asked, “so what?” She answered, “well, think about it – if you live to be 100 you’ll probably only read 80 years of that – and, at about 50 books a year that’s only 4000 books in a lifetime. Now, realistically, how many do you really read in a year??? 5?? 10?? Maybe 20?? At 10 that is only 800 books in a lifetime which is high for most people – so, you’d better make damn sure you pick books that make a difference in you’re life and dump any that don’t !!!!”

    Great advice for kick’n off 2015 I’d say. Frosty here in MN!! Take care!!

    Don

  12. Great post. Looked too long to be read, I almost skipped it but then I couldn’t stop reading it: curiosity in alert, soul touched in several places. Very moving. Love the insights (perhaps too many in one shot. Overdose warning). I am done with screwing around in 2015 (that’s what I am writing in my letter). Feed that hunger until it is too painful to stay in a tricky confort zone. I would love to have JC successes (and to write so beautifully). I would love to have tremendous success. Hard truth, I am just a regular gal who actually had that motto from the bible Ask, seek, knock., yet thought she had to do it all by herself. Some truth are hard to hear. Man, I am happy your wrote this. It always makes me thirsty for more. I picture Jesus asking me what I did with that gift of being able to ask, seek, knock: What did you ask, what did you seek, where did you knock?

    • Hi Catherine. To answer your question would require a book. I just changed my entire attitude… cuz I was 33, a total slacking loser, and I felt I had to get on my horse and start figuring shit out. I became fearless in asking any question that came to me, of anyone I felt might have an answer, and ignored bad responses and followed up on the good ones. I was rejected, insulted, ushered out of rooms, and told to stop bothering people. I also began the process that eventually led to me being invited into the back rooms of the rich and powerful, where the grand lessons of living well are shared.

      There are no easy answers to what you ask. You have to start where you are, with what you have… and just start. Make your first move, then armed with whatever lesson you glean from that move, make your next move, and your next, and your next.

      It’s all a process. No magic. Desire, research the consequences and realities of those desires, plan to acquire what you want, then put that plan into action. Repeat as necessary.

      Good luck.

      • Thank you John. I am printing this post and answer and I will make sure to strive to apply the lessons in 2015. I am sure it has the power to help move forward in the right direction. I don’t want to be at the same place on December 31, 2015.

  13. I definetly love this post, funny, entertaining, but
    Above all, insightfull lots of tidy bits of wisdom I had to
    Read it twice because I sensed it was powerfull.
    Doing that letter now for sure.
    Thanks Jhon.

  14. I have been teaching kids and teens in my financial summer camps the difference between pushing goals and being pulled forward by them for several years and they always love the distinction.

    The hardest part for people is just letting go of their previously held beliefs about what works and what doesn’t in terms of goal setting and goal accomplishing.

    It’s always amazing to me that the most important stuff we need in life isn’t taught in schools!

  15. Hi John,

    I’ve just reread my Jan 15 letter from last year (as well as your post above) and I managed to hit my primary goal of no longer working for man. Some of other stuff I mentioned didn’t work out the way I expected… but the point is doing this exercise works.

    I’m now going to do next years letter and set the bar even higher. Thanks for the inspiration man.

    Scott

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