Comments on: Patience, Dude http://www.john-carlton.com/2005/03/16/patience_dude/ insight, tactics, advice and mutterings on copywriting, marketing and living life deep... from the most ripped-off world-class ad writer alive... Thu, 04 Dec 2008 00:43:03 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.2 By: ken calhoun http://www.john-carlton.com/2005/03/16/patience_dude/#comment-69 ken calhoun Fri, 18 Mar 2005 06:18:20 +0000 http://www.john-carlton.com/2005/03/16/patience_dude/#comment-69 Agreed. One of the few things I remember from grade school was my 8th grade english teacher Ms McAuliffe telling me that sometimes it's best to write things and not send/publish them. (this after a particularly funny incident whereby I wrote an expose-type article for the school newsletter talking about why the principal and one of the female teachers seemed to be spending so much time together off campus when they should be doing their jobs....)... they didn't publish the article - surprise! So I learned that writing and publishing can be 2 discrete events. I don't like having to self-censor, but sometimes it's in the greater good. It's true, in a cathartic kind of way - you can and should release the comments, the pent up actual words, but just don't mail (or email) it... ken Agreed. One of the few things I remember from grade school was my 8th grade english teacher Ms McAuliffe telling me that sometimes it’s best to write things and not send/publish them.

(this after a particularly funny incident whereby I wrote an expose-type article for the school newsletter talking about why the principal and one of the female teachers seemed to be spending so much time together off campus when they should be doing their jobs….)… they didn’t publish the article - surprise!

So I learned that writing and publishing can be 2 discrete events. I don’t like having to self-censor, but sometimes it’s in the greater good.

It’s true, in a cathartic kind of way - you can and should release the comments, the pent up actual words, but just don’t mail (or email) it…

ken

]]> By: Timothy Warnock http://www.john-carlton.com/2005/03/16/patience_dude/#comment-67 Timothy Warnock Thu, 17 Mar 2005 16:59:18 +0000 http://www.john-carlton.com/2005/03/16/patience_dude/#comment-67 Brilliant John, You touched a sensitive nerve with me as I'm an impulsive person by nature. I firmly believe that greatness follows passion, and there are times we have to make a stand in our communications - but impulsive stands can be the source of future regret. One of the worst feelings is that sense of sheer horror after a very impulsive and emotional message is already sent - too late - whether an email, or forum post, whatever... maybe just one individual is reading it, maybe dozens, perhaps hundreds or even thousands... I don't know about you, but I've afflicted myself with moments of pure writhing agony after I came back to read what I had sent so confidently, perhaps flippantly without thinking, just a few hours before. God, I hate that feeling... "The Dawn Of A Dumb-Ass". It was Abe Lincoln who said something like (I'm paraphrasing), "write your angry letter, get it out of your system, but never send it until at least 24 hours pass and you can re-read it when you have settled down, if you still feel the same way when you are calm - then send it". Sometimes it feels like I have to put on ski gloves (so I can't type), or get up and walk outside to avoid responding immediately to some perceived slight, or whatever it was that got me either too hot, or too silly... and chill. A practice that I have found helpful is I do write a response, but instead of "send", I hit "draft" - and for forum posts, I write my response in "Notepad" and save it to my desktop... especially if it is late, and I'm tired. It's amazing how much discipline such a silly practice requires - but those anguished moments of "what have I done?!? I'm such a dork!..." are becoming much more rare (at least for this small part of life :-). Great blog - I really appreciate it, Tim Brilliant John,

You touched a sensitive nerve with me as I’m an impulsive person by nature. I firmly believe that greatness follows passion, and there are times we have to make a stand in our communications - but impulsive stands can be the source of future regret.

One of the worst feelings is that sense of sheer horror after a very impulsive and emotional message is already sent - too late - whether an email, or forum post, whatever… maybe just one individual is reading it, maybe dozens, perhaps hundreds or even thousands…

I don’t know about you, but I’ve afflicted myself with moments of pure writhing agony after I came back to read what I had sent so confidently, perhaps flippantly without thinking, just a few hours before.

God, I hate that feeling… “The Dawn Of A Dumb-Ass”.

It was Abe Lincoln who said something like (I’m paraphrasing), “write your angry letter, get it out of your system, but never send it until at least 24 hours pass and you can re-read it when you have settled down, if you still feel the same way when you are calm - then send it”.

Sometimes it feels like I have to put on ski gloves (so I can’t type), or get up and walk outside to avoid responding immediately to some perceived slight, or whatever it was that got me either too hot, or too silly… and chill.

A practice that I have found helpful is I do write a response, but instead of “send”, I hit “draft” - and for forum posts, I write my response in “Notepad” and save it to my desktop… especially if it is late, and I’m tired.

It’s amazing how much discipline such a silly practice requires - but those anguished moments of “what have I done?!? I’m such a dork!…” are becoming much more rare (at least for this small part of life :-).

Great blog - I really appreciate it,

Tim

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